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EWH3 #1042: The Between the Holidays Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, December 28 – Silver Spring Metro, Red line metro)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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Where: Silver Spring Metro – exit on the bus station side, not the NOAA side. Follow marks to circle!

Hares: Special Head Kid, Pinochi-ho, Cum Dumpling, maybe others

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’ (you can easily walk to the metro from End Circle or the On-After). No PI seen by hares, dog friendly, stroller friendly, crippled gimp friendly. Low shiggy. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

Last trains out of Silver Spring:
to Glenmont at 11:58 PM,
or to Shady Grove 11:12 PM
Red

On After: The Fire Station 1 Restaurant, and Bar at 8131 Georgia Ave, Silver Spring

Specials: There will be some! And there was much rejoicing.

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EWH3 #1041: The It’s a Tuck Life Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, December 21- Cleveland Park Metro (Red Line)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 21st, 2017. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Cleveland Park Metro, behind California Tortilla (3501 Connecticut Ave., NW) – Use the East side exit and follow marks to start.

Hares: Tuck Tuck Deuce, Red Vag of Courage, I’m Tho Thor, Sorest Rump, You Only Cum Once, and PIO

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

Last trains out of Tenleytown Metro

Glenmont 11:19 PM

Shady Grove 11:51 PM

On After: Guapo’s

Specials: Guapo’s special for Jumbo Margaritas = $13.95. Usually $16. Beer specials TBA

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EWH3 #1039 EDubs turns 18! Trail: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 7th – Virginia Square Metro (Orange/Silver Lines!)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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Prepare your liver and gird your loins! This week’s hares present The EDubs turns 18 (so maybe Roy Moore will stop bothering us now) Trail!(Alternate themes that did not make cut: “Tonight we’re going to party like it’s 1999, “Old guys haring: a date that will live in infamy”, “Running around drinking on a school night” and “Yule log schmuull log, burn it all”)

Cum out and celebrate with a bunch of veteran wankers who may or may not vaguely remember 1999 and when everyday is Wednesday actually hashed on Wednesday.

When: 6:45 PM Thursday December 7th, 2017. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Virginia Square Metro (Orange and Silver lines) — follow marks to start

Hares: Big Bang, Blows A Tranny, Duck Job, Monday Sticky Monday, Put It Out, Wax On Wacks Off and a Mystery Hare!

Miscellaneous Crap: Live A to B trail over hill and dale past more tacky Christmas lights than you can shake your cane at. Multiple stops for merriment in store. Maybe some old school EWH3 traditions too. Bring a lamp cuz it’s dark and bring warm clothes cuz it’s December.

On After: Buffalo Wild Wings (950 N Glebe Rd)

Specials: $4 22 oz domestics & $4 apps 10pm to close

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EWH3 #1038: The Third Anal Ugly Sweater Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, November 30th- Eastern Market Metro (Blue, Orange, and Silver Lines)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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Did you know that male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, but female reindeer don’t? So that ugly sweater you have of humping reindeer is a whole lot kinkier than you thought. And  Thursdayis your chance to wear it! That’s right, for the third year in a row, we are giving you the chance to wear your tackiest, ugliest, or most hideous holiday sweater on a winter wonderland romp through the wilds of Capitol Hill!

When: Thursday November 30th, 2017. Pack away at 7:15

Where: Eastern Market Metro (Blue, Orange, and Silver Lines) – follow marks to start!

Hares: Head Injury, A Midsemester Night’s Cream, Cheech & Dong, Issues & Tissues, La Gingeracha, and Rosetta Bone.

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. No PI was seen whilst scouting.  Runner’s and Walker’s trail is dog friendly.  Walkers’ trail is stroller friendly, and runners’ trail is tough stroller friendly . It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

Last trains out of Potomac Avenue Metro (Blue, Orange, and Silver Lines):

Largo Town Center — 11:49 PM
New Carrollton — 11:50PM
Franconia-Springfield –11:15PM
Vienna — 11:21 PM
Wiehle-Reston East — 11:08 PM

On After:
Trusty’s

Specials: If everyone is special, then no one is special.
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EWH3 #1036: The Unst Unst Unst Part Deux: The November Sessions! – 6:45 PM Thursday, November 16th – Pentagon City (Blue/Yellow)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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EWH3 Hash Trash #1027: The Juggalo Trail!

EWH3 Hash Trash #1027: The Juggalo Trail!

When: 6:45 PM Thursday September 14th, 2017

Where: Braddock Road Metro

Hares: Topher, Dude That Guy, Penis Fly Trap, Maybe It’s Gaybelline

Virgins: Justs Sarah, Cheryl, Brian

Visitors: There were a lot, especially from the Keys. Mostly evacuees actually. Future Wanker, take a moment to Google (or the equivalent of such) Hurricane Irma. It was quite devastating for 2017 standards.

On-After: Joe Theismann’s Restaurant! Featuring $4 rails, $4 drafts, $4 shots! Except it wasn’t.

A juggalo (feminine juggalette, or juggala in Spanish) is a fan of the group Insane Clown Posse or any other Psychopathic Records hip hop group. Now you know!

My, what an evening clowning around Alexandria. Some say that little jaunt across the Bataan Peninsular was cake walk compared to the ordeal suffered by EWH3. Let’s hear of some of the highlights:

Violations:

One of our visitors, Senior Sodomizing Slut, lamented at his neglecting to keep his watch running. SSS, if you’re looking to time your performance, two minutes is 120 seconds!

With Fall upon us, Cheech & Dong shared her desire for cold weather Hashes so she can disrobe on trail. I guess Winter IS cumming!

The Hares botched “Hi My Name Is Joe” at beginning circle. That begs the question, “what was in their face paint?” “Lead?!”

The Hares also laid so many blind turns they could keep this route for the next “Ray Charles” Trail!

After a long time hiatus to pursue his cycle, Just Georgie, returned to the Hash wearing racist attire!

There was no naming this evening.

On – Wait Wait – On

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EWH3 Hash Trash #1015: The Red White and Blue Jello Shots Trail!

EWH3 Hash Trash #1015: The Red White and Blue Jello Shots Trail! Thursday, July 6th Courthouse Metro (Orange/SIlver Line)

When: 6:45 PM Thursday June 22nd, 2017. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Courthouse Metro

Hares: All Flash No Drive, Seizure’s Phallus, Nobody Puts Gayby in a Corner, Head Injury, Rear Protein Injection, and Geriatric Mandering

Virgins: Just Simon, Just Chinaz

Visitors: Slut Machine

On After: Continental Pool Lounge

Violations:

Tuck Tuck Duece is being violated for yelling at Deaf Lesbian to turn back on trail. Tuck, his name is Deaf Lesbian, not Hard of Hearing Lesbian! Guess Tuck’s easily confused, just like Revolutionary War general Israel Putnam.

Our visitors from across the pond, Just Simon and Just Chinaz, were previously banned from White House H3. Why? For trying to start fires!

Maybe It’s Gaybelline was caught on trail getting Eiffel Towered by Diddler and someone else idk it’s been awhile. Anyway, he was just as fucked as General Cornwallis and his Hessian goons at Yorktown!

No Naming.

On-Wait Wait-On

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EWH3 Hash Trash #1031: The Seventh Anal Pretty Pretty Princess!

EWH3 Hash Trash #1031: The Seventh Anal Pretty Pretty Princess Trail Thursday October 12, 2017

When: 6:45 PM Thursday October 12, 2017

Where: NoMa Metro

Hares: Colliteral Damage, All Flash No Drive, Chokes One Out, Keebler’s Shelf, Fukushemale, You Sucked My Battledick, and Just Rachel

Virgin: Just Sophie

Visitor: Just Jim

On After: Dew Drop Inn

In the context of royalty, a morganatic marriage, sometimes called a left-handed marriage is a marriage between people of unequal social rank, which prevents the passage of the husband’s titles and privileges to the wife and any children born of the marriage.

Violations:

Our virgin, Just Sophie, attended her first hash with EWH3. Guess we’re Sophie’s Choice!

Poon-apple Juice is receiving a commendation for dressing as a unicorn. I suppose she needed a public display of horniness!

Long time Hasher, Dial F, requested Taco Bell for his 369th run. I guess the only way he’ll eat a taco is if the Hash buys one for him!

The Naming of Just Rachel:
Just Rachel is from the whitest of George, spending most of her time in the rural bliss of Barnesville. A precocious teen, Rachel seduced a the comely Kelsey after a breakup and shared with her the wonders of a frozen banana. Frozen cucumbers work better. Rachel once had a boyfriend shake hands with friends after trilling down below. Was this before or after she broke up with him via Skype chat? She’d love to get smashed by Bruce Banner feat. Black Widow, and was once a sub at Taste, Touch, Feel. Her biggest claims to fame are working at Bandcamp, writing humorous articles, and winning the best ass award at White House Campout. In the infancy of naming, she joined the ranks of many wonderful Hashers by being named by the lovely Rosetta Bone. Welcum to the family, A Thong of Ice & Fire!

 

On-MyFavoritePrincessIsPrincessMargaret-On

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EWH3 #1031: The Seventh Anal Pretty Pretty Princess Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, October 12th- NoMa (Red Line)


For general questions on hashing, email us questions at ewh3info@gmail.com.

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It’s that time again! Don your tiara, your hot dog suit, your tutu, your unicorn head – whatever makes you feel like a pretty pretty princess. Glitter that sh*t up and come run around NorthEast with us!

When: 6:45 PM Thursday October 12, 2017. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: NoMa Metro, take the M St exit, follow marks to start

Hares: Colliteral Damage, All Flash No Drive, Chokes One Out, Keebler’s Shelf, Fukushemale, You Sucked My Battledick, and Just Rachel!

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. Dog friendly – debatable at on after. But probably, in view of recent DC Council emergency session. No P.I. Should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug (it gets dark at 7 pm now, guys)! Be smart, have fun.

Last red line trains: Thou hast phone, thou shalt google.

On After: Dew Drop Inn 2801 8th Street NE, Washington, D.C. 20017 (I hear people like it for prelube, but it’s a bit far from start)

Specials: Yea!

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EWH3 #1028: The 30 Years of Where’s Waldo Trail(s)! — September 21st — 5:15 for Ballbuster (Stadium Armory — Orange Line) OR 6:45 PM for Regular Trail (Capital South — Orange Line!)

Hey Wankers, don’t forget to let us know which trail you intend to run! –  https://goo.gl/forms/vGviTEokUXkLcrVs2

TRAIL BLUF:

BALLBUSTER TRAIL (Runners Only!): Starting at Stadium-Armory Station (Orange Line). Pack Away 5:45 PM SHARP!  Trail is 11-12 miles with multiple beer checks.  Trail is A to B and kinda long. No dogs, no strollers. Very slight chance of PI, high chance of mosquitoes and darkness, as well as beer. Bring a headlamp!!!

 REGULAR TRAIL (Runners and Walkers): Starting at Capitol South Metro Station (Orange Line). Pack Away 7:15 PM. These trails will be the usual EWH3 trail length. Trail is A-Z.

All trails will end in the same location for a joint circle.

And now for the rest of the details:

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EWH3 #1028: The 30 Years of Where’s Waldo Trail! – Thursday, Sepember 21st – 5:15 PM – Stadium Armory Metro (Silver/Orange/Blue) and 6:45 PM – Capitol South Metro (Silver/Orange/Blue)

Met a cute hasher last week and told them you’ll see them at the next trail?

The theme for EWH3’s Pre-RDR weekend is Where’s Waldo, so good luck finding them! Mwahaha!

Cum to trail dressed in your best Where’s Waldo costume to celebrate his 30th Anniversary! (And to also help you hide from that weirdo that kept hitting on you last week.)

And don’t forget to let us know which trail you plan to run!

When: Thursday September 21st, 2017.
Ballbuster Trail.  Sign-in at 5:15pm. Pack away at 5:45 pm SHARP!!!
Regular Trail.  Sign in at 6:45pm. Pack away at 7:15 pm!

Where:
Ballbuster from Stadium-Armory Station (Orange Line)
Regular Trail from Capitol South Metro Station (Orange Line)

Hares:
Ballbuster: Moose Knuckles, Mouthful of Clam, Goldman Ballsachs, Chics Ahoy!, and All Flash No Drive
Regular: Sorest Rump, Tuck Tuck Deuce, I’m Tho Thor, Red Vag of Courage, You Only Cum Once, General Tso’s Dickens

Miscellaneous Crap: THERE ARE TWO TRAILS!!!

BALLBUSTER TRAIL (Runners Only!): Starting at Stadium-Armory Metro Station (Orange Line). Pack Away 5:45 PM Sharp!  Trail is 11-12 miles with multiple beer checks.  Bring a headlamp! Trail is A to B and kinda long. No dogs, no strollers. Very slight chance of PI, high chance of mosquitoes and darkness, as well as beer. Bring a headlamp!!! Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Let us know if you’re cumming and Bring a headlamp!

REGULAR TRAIL (Runners and Walkers): Starting at Capitol South Metro Station (Orange/Blue/Silver Line). Pack Away 7:15 PM. Trail is A to B. Dog friendly. Stroller friendly. No PI. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

All trails will end in the same location for a joint circle.

Last trains out of Potomac Ave Metro (Silver/Orange/Blue):
Franconia-Springfield – 11:15 PM
Largo Town Center – 11:40 PM
New Carrollton – 11:50 PM
Vienna/Fairfax-GMU – 11:21 PM
Wiehle-Reston East – 11:08 PM

On After:
Trusty’s! 1420 Pennsylvania Ave SE, Washington, DC 20003

Specials: $1 off all draft and rail drinks!

***For all the visitors and virgins, please note at EWH3 only the Hash Flash is allowed to take pictures. Thanks!***