The most dreaded day of the year has arrived for most students, but some of us ended up marrying hot MILF teachers, so Van Halen will ring in our ears as those loser kids ring in the new school year. Come out to Friendship Heights and get as dirty as all your (now-problematic) fantasies of banging your 6th grade history teacher while the janitor watches.
Pre-requisites: Be familiar with the original, other tributes are encouraged.
Nearest Capital Bike Share: 38.96249233677861, -77.08599747838093
Hares: Semen on the Pew & Cum Dumpling
Trail Details: – Runners: 2.9 mi. first half / 1.25 mi. second half
– Walkers: 2 mi first half / .5 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 4.69 runners/walkers
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. Shiggy rating: 4.69 for both walkers and runners. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.
We also have a bag van for your personal items! End Metro: Friendship Heights
Last Trains Out:
Glenmont: 12:24am
On After*:Aura Bar & Grill, 5247 Wisconsin Ave, NW, Washington, DC
RED DRESS RUN is coming! Rego is live! Don’t forget to rego for BLT (Boxers, Lingerie, Toga) if you want to part the whole weekend! https://hashrego.com/events/dc-rdr
Join the EWH3 Discord channel!!! Chat with your friends and other EWH3 members, while also finding trail information all in one place! Make sure to change your name to your hash name upon entering! https://tinyurl.com/ewh3discord
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2026-08-18 20:09:512026-08-19 10:47:07EWH3 #1532: The Back to School, aka Hot for Teacher, Hash, Thursday, August 20, 2026, Friendship Heights (Red Line)
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, August 13, 2026. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Potomac Ave Metro
Nearest Capital Bike Share: Potomac & Pennsylvania Ave SE
Hares: Ha-Cum-On My Tatas, Lorena Hobbit, and These Are The Tits You’re Looking For
Trail Details: – Runners: 2 mi. first half / 1.6 mi. second half
– Walkers: 1 mi. first half / 0.8 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’ (0.4 mi to Potomac Ave Metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.
We also have a bag van for your personal items! End Metro: Potomac Ave (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Last Trains Out:
West-bound:
Silver to Ashburn – 11:45 PM
Orange to Vienna – 11:53 PM
Blue to Franconia-Springfield – 11:40 PM
East-bound:
Silver/Blue to Downtown Largo – 12:20 AM
Orange to New Carrollton – 12:23 AM
On After*: Trusty’s
Specials: Your hares are special
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
RED DRESS RUN is coming! Rego is live! Don’t forget to rego for BLT (Boxers, Lingerie, Toga) if you want to part the whole weekend! https://hashrego.com/events/dc-rdr
Join the EWH3 Discord channel!!! Chat with your friends and other EWH3 members, while also finding trail information all in one place! Make sure to change your name to your hash name upon entering! https://tinyurl.com/ewh3discord
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2026-08-09 15:40:082026-08-09 15:40:12EWH3 #1531: The Bubbles Trail, August 13, 2026, Potomac Ave (Blue/Orange/Silver)
10 years ago, a very confused muggle walking home through an already sketch parking lot saw dozens of strange people in various states of undress, gathered around a van with kegs in the back. In a somewhat completely predictable display of poor judgement, he decided to investigate. Within 24 hours, he’d called his therapist to say he found a much cheaper alternative for what to do with his Thursdays.
Please join us for a very special edition of EWH3s ABC* Run: All Biplolar’s Comorbidities. Caution tape, cardboard, duct tape, aluminum foil, a bedsheet toga, strategically placed stuffed animals, pool floats, whatever the recycling gave you. Cotton is cheating. Wear shoes you can run in, bring a change of clothes for the bar, and most importantly, a desire to solve your problems with alcohol.
We also have a bag van for your personal items! End Metro: Federal Center SW (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Last Trains Out:
Downtown Largo (Blue) – 12:07 am
Franconia-Springfield (Blue) – 11:46 pm
New Carrollton (Orange) – 12:05 am
Vienna (Orange) – 11:59 pm
Downtown Largo (Silver) – 12:15 am
Ashburn (Silver) – 11:51 pm
On After*: Walter’s Sports Bar, 10 N St SE
Specials: YOU’RE special!
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
RED DRESS RUN is coming! Rego is live! Don’t forget to rego for BLT (Boxers, Lingerie, Toga) if you want to part the whole weekend! https://hashrego.com/events/dc-rdr
Join the EWH3 Discord channel!!! Chat with your friends and other EWH3 members, while also finding trail information all in one place! Make sure to change your name to your hash name upon entering! https://tinyurl.com/ewh3discord
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2026-08-04 07:52:522026-08-05 23:08:39EWH3 #1530: The 13th Anal ABC Trail, August 6, 2026, Capitol South (Blue/Orange/Silver Line)
EWH3 #1532: The Back to School, aka Hot for Teacher, Hash, Thursday, August 20, 2026, Friendship Heights (Red Line)
Prelube: Clydes of Chevy Chase, 5441 Wisconsin Ave, Chevy Chase, MD
***********
The most dreaded day of the year has arrived for most students, but some of us ended up marrying hot MILF teachers, so Van Halen will ring in our ears as those loser kids ring in the new school year. Come out to Friendship Heights and get as dirty as all your (now-problematic) fantasies of banging your 6th grade history teacher while the janitor watches.
Pre-requisites: Be familiar with the original, other tributes are encouraged.
YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD
When: 6:45 PM Thursday,August 20, 2026. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Friendship Heights Station, Chevy Chase Pavillion exit. Look for marks/wankers.
Nearest Capital Bike Share: 38.96249233677861, -77.08599747838093
Hares: Semen on the Pew & Cum Dumpling
Trail Details:
– Runners: 2.9 mi. first half / 1.25 mi. second half
– Walkers: 2 mi first half / .5 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 4.69 runners/walkers
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. Shiggy rating: 4.69 for both walkers and runners. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.
We also have a bag van for your personal items!
End Metro: Friendship Heights
Last Trains Out:
Glenmont: 12:24am
On After*: Aura Bar & Grill, 5247 Wisconsin Ave, NW, Washington, DC
Specials: $5 bottled beers, $7 drafts, $7 mixed drinks, $12 loaded nachos, $12 beef sliders, $10 buffalo chicken dip
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
Give Back to the Hash!
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
EWH3 #1531: The Bubbles Trail, August 13, 2026, Potomac Ave (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Prelube: The Roost (It’s a food hall, so food and drinks of your choosing!)
***********
Did you love blowing bubbles as a kid? How about Dubble Bubble? Was Bubbles your favorite Powerpuff Girl?
Let’s be honest, we know your real favorite is popping a bottle of bubbly 🍾
Lucky for us all, August 13 is National Prosecco Day! You bring the bubbles, your hares will bring the bubbly, and we’ll see you on trail!
YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, August 13, 2026. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Potomac Ave Metro
Nearest Capital Bike Share: Potomac & Pennsylvania Ave SE
Hares: Ha-Cum-On My Tatas, Lorena Hobbit, and These Are The Tits You’re Looking For
Trail Details:
– Runners: 2 mi. first half / 1.6 mi. second half
– Walkers: 1 mi. first half / 0.8 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’ (0.4 mi to Potomac Ave Metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.
We also have a bag van for your personal items!
End Metro: Potomac Ave (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Last Trains Out:
West-bound:
Silver to Ashburn – 11:45 PM
Orange to Vienna – 11:53 PM
Blue to Franconia-Springfield – 11:40 PM
East-bound:
Silver/Blue to Downtown Largo – 12:20 AM
Orange to New Carrollton – 12:23 AM
On After*: Trusty’s
Specials: Your hares are special
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
Give Back to the Hash!
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
EWH3 #1530: The 13th Anal ABC Trail, August 6, 2026, Capitol South (Blue/Orange/Silver Line)
Prelube: Bullfeathers, 410 First St SE
***********
10 years ago, a very confused muggle walking home through an already sketch parking lot saw dozens of strange people in various states of undress, gathered around a van with kegs in the back. In a somewhat completely predictable display of poor judgement, he decided to investigate. Within 24 hours, he’d called his therapist to say he found a much cheaper alternative for what to do with his Thursdays.
Please join us for a very special edition of EWH3s ABC* Run: All Biplolar’s Comorbidities. Caution tape, cardboard, duct tape, aluminum foil, a bedsheet toga, strategically placed stuffed animals, pool floats, whatever the recycling gave you. Cotton is cheating. Wear shoes you can run in, bring a change of clothes for the bar, and most importantly, a desire to solve your problems with alcohol.
*ABC = Anything But Clothes
YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, August 6, 2026. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Providence Park, follow marks to Start from Capitol South Metro
Nearest Capital Bike Share:
Hares: Bipolar Bear, Uno Dos Tres Lift Off, Please Step Away from the Whores, These Are the Tits You’re Looking For, Mrs. Nuttersworth
Trail Details:
– Runners: 2.4 mi. first half / 1.7 mi. second half
– Walkers: 1.1 mi first half / 0.8 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B (0.3 mi to Federal Center SW Metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.
We also have a bag van for your personal items!
End Metro: Federal Center SW (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Last Trains Out:
Downtown Largo (Blue) – 12:07 am
Franconia-Springfield (Blue) – 11:46 pm
New Carrollton (Orange) – 12:05 am
Vienna (Orange) – 11:59 pm
Downtown Largo (Silver) – 12:15 am
Ashburn (Silver) – 11:51 pm
On After*: Walter’s Sports Bar, 10 N St SE
Specials: YOU’RE special!
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
Give Back to the Hash!
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!