EWH3 # 623 Christmas Eve Eve Hash

 

Hares: Snatch Shot, Underground Railroad, Tit-ka-boob, Can’t Find Pu$$y in a Haystack

                      

Virgins: Just Brad, AJ, Mo, and Zach

 

Visitors: Big Trouble Little Vagina

 

Analversaries: 17- Pee On A Colada, Yule Log, and a whole bunch more.

 

OnOnOn: Hawk and Dove

 

Holy shit it was cold out, thankfully I made sure to wear a very thick beer blanket. A very small contingent of hashers who either have no leave or just don’t love their families circled up outside the Capitol South metro for the Christmas Eve Eve hash. And because we have all been such good boys and girls Santa even made an appearance…although it turned out it was just PIO trying to get girls to sit on his lap.  It was your typical Cap Hill hash with lots of alleys and row houses that all kind of look alike. After running around lost for a while we finally picked up trail and followed it to yet another alley for beer check.

 

After downing some tasty tasty beer slushies (seriously it was that cold) we were once again off. We headed down towards the Navy Yard and were quickly turned into the skate park under 395…or 295…whatever that road is for the On In. I love short trails! 

 

 

Violations:

 

Pee On A Colada was heard saying that the first time she saw a dick coming at her she was terrified, thankfully the dude’s mom walked in just as things were about to get interesting getting her off the hook. 

 

Just Tyler apparently took the repeal of DADT to heart and brought 4 male virgins to the hash

 

The Walkers were commended for their impromptu beer check….Where RhinoBlastMe stole a margarita for the road.

 

The Hares for getting caught by the DFL

 

Private Snowball for being the DFL that caught the hares and then asking directions….and still getting lost

 

Just Cecilia for throwing her full beer in the trash….alcohol abuse!

 

Just Tyler also got his virgins to wear shorts for easy access.

 

U Goat Girl was on OkCupid and wanted to introduce One Tit Only to someone he thought she would be interested in……it was herself.

 

Private Snowball only charges $0.25

 

Violations from the Crowd:

 

The Virgins for all being gay

 

WoWo doesn’t know where the hot blonds come from

 

Then it was time for a very special occasion….a naming!!!

 

Just Eric is from Texas and like the rest of the hash attended GW whose mascot is the Colonial (he may actually be the first one to know that though) and is currently funemployed. He likes Beauty and the Beast and Reverse Cowgirl. Apparently the first time he had sex he and the girl found out the hard way that she was allergic to latex. When he went to visit a friend in Dubai they were partying with some of the royal family who felt he wasn’t getting enough….so they ordered him some hookers. Also while on vacation he once banged a British girl on a lifeguard stand. 

 

No one was feeling very creative but here are the few names that didn’t suck:

 

Contact Dermatitis

Oasis In My Hand

Virgin Atlantic

London Bitches Going Down

 

Henceforth and forevermore throughout the world of hashing (except Great Falls–fuck them!), Just Eric shall be known as London Bitches Going Down

 

Off to the bar we went to thaw out and try to get laid one last time before the forced celibacy that is Christmas with the family….

 

On-Merry F-ing Christmas-On

6 Pigs in a Blanket

EWH3 Scribe