EWH3 #655

EWH3 #655: The Cock Family Reunion Trail- Union Station

Hares: Shamrock Your Cock, Cock-A-Doodle Do Me, Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock, Cock Your Suck I Will, and Cock Soup
Virgins: Just Brian, Alice, TJ, Colleen, Megan, Claire, Shannon, Sarah, Ryan, Jamie, Matthais, Emily, Ari, Allie, Ted
Visitors:
Semi-Cut Doctor, BoiseCan’t Fuck DustJust Jessica, MontereyStreet Meat, MontereyButt Feeler, Belgium (transplant)
OnOnOn: My Brother’s Place
Let’s be honest, this being a week after my collarbone snapped under the weight of my awesomeness (it’s a tough loadto bare), I really don’t know much of what occurred with this trail, though judging by the hares, I’d have to assume thatit sucked, well, you can see where I’m going with this, right? Anyway…
We circled up out front of the taxi stand in Union Station for the regular pageantry, marked by a celebration ofPreparation O landing her dream job. The walkers basically walked towards the meat market off of Florida Avenue,where we eventually met up with the walkers. Note: stinky alley = fun drinking. There were some undercover cops whorolled by, but then realized we were no threat and left. We headed out, the walker’s trail growing noticeably larger(lazy wankers!) on the second half, and headed to the typical alley behind My Brother’s Place for drinking, fun, and ofcourse some…
Violations!
Chippen Failz and was asking Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock for 200 condoms, obviously for straight purposes.
Yes Sir, Yes She’s Fat brought the entire Israeli Guard with him to the hash- all men.
Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock is always interested in cock-associated ventures, only this one actually involved women.
Hungry Hungry Homo thought the only thing he did wrong at a hash party was taking the remote for the lights. Wellyea, that and the puke.
What do Yule Log’s penis and the BC ally have in common? They both make Miss Me Gag Me, well, gag.
Just Sarah brought phone and keys on trail- apparently she had been warned about Chippen Failz.
The Hares found an alley that smelled worse than the pack.
Rear Protein Injection was bleeding and didn’t know why- obviously he forgot about the S&M session from earlier.
Obesetiologist and Titlee Winks are moving to Alabama so they can be smart by association.
Monday Sticky Monday was jealous of the hares, so he brought his own cock shirt.
And then of course, it was time for a naming!
Just Paul is from Upstate NY. He went to American University to study statistics and finance and is now a consultant.
His favorite Disney movie is Babmbi, his favorite porn is Nuts and Butts, and he loves doggystyle. One time, whilecooking dinner for his girlfriend, he decided to spice things up a bit by using habanero peppers. Dinner was obviouslydelicious, because afterward he was getting lucky. Things got hot, literally, since he forgot to wash his hands thoroughlybefore touching her lady parts, transferring all that heat to her nether region. This of course set off a shit storm, and weonly got two names:
Fire CrotchChilean Miner
before we immediately agreed that Just Paul would become Chilean Miner.
This naming went so quick that it was time for another!
Just Cara grew up in Madison, WI. She went to GW and is the roommate of Miss Me Gag Me. She works for USAIDdoing public health, looooves African babies, the Lion King, girl on top sex, and goats. Um. Anyway- one time she hadsex in a golf course, also in an outdoor shower when her dad walked in. Some names included:
Tiger’s WoodHole in OneOverseas STDsButt DiamondFart of Darkness
It was then decided that Just Cara would hereafter be referred to as Fart of Darkness.
We went to the bar and creeped people out by playing flip cups with napkins as bandannas- oh wait, that was just me.
OnOnWhiskey BusinessEWH3 Scribe