Hash Trash: EWH3 #705: The Hairy Palm Thursday Trail
Where: Francis Scott Key Park
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, March 29, 2012. Pack away at 7:15ish. Or whenever.
Hares: St. Pauli’s Girl, Put It Out, Cutting Class, London Bitches Going Down and Just Daniel
Virgins: Just Chad, Justin, Kristin, Sherri, Karla, ???, Erin, David, Meredith, Sarah, Steve, Nick, Aline, Amy, Dave, Jake, Sylvester, Kara, Alison, Alan, Kat, Kendall, Brett.
Visitors: Sex (seriously. That was his hash name. Also, he was visiting from Uganda.), I Love Fat Chicks.
We circled up in Francis Scott Key Park. Plan B was stuffed and overstuffed as usual (I heard someone brought a laptop, but not until later bc that absolutely would have been a violation). Our GM for the evening was HhH and his beard. Which has started talking back. Virgins were instructed, introduced (which took FOREVER) and had their song. In a new and exciting twist, we had the distinct pleasure of having an interpreter in our midst! More on that to cum.
Trail was… actually, it was really well laid and they didn’t even include the Exorcist Stairs. Which, is kind of lame, but my legs appreciated it. Anyhow, we ran a lot, had two beer checks and I forgot to write down anymore notes about trail. But none of you wankers read this anyhow.
Whiskey was RA for the evening and got circle going in grand fashion – after the random tour bus took a pass by us. Apparently, we are now part of the DC sights. Whiskey did his thing, Jubilee did his thing, and then there were
- Just Nikki was violated because she brings enough clothing to outfit a Lady Gaga video. Seriously. That violation came from Plan B, who is tired of carrying her shit around!
- Just Mary was violated for wearing a racer shirt. She should have borrowed something from Just Nikki.
- Just Kat was violated for having her underwear up her ass the whole time. It was getting in the way of everyone cumming in.
- Wank Like an Egyptian was violated along with these pussies, because he loses pussy every time he gets drunk.
- Blows a Tranny’s ass was very sore tonight, but Whiskey did apologize for fisting him, so we can only assume everything’s ok with them.
- Don’t ask Don’t smell went to the Tragic school of haring apparently, as it was his turn to get the Walker’s Trail lost this week.
- Speaking of Tragic, he was violated for scaring muggles. I’m not sure what he did, but it probably didn’t take much.
- Just Cara was violated for having technology on trail – so were some other folks, but Prep Oh took over then and I was drinking, so I didn’t hear who it was.
- JAG Queen proved he gets laid by knocking a woman up. He had a son this week! And yet came hashing. Which is why we question whether he gets laid. We’ve cum full circle!
- Just Alex won the best violation of the night award – so dedicated is he to the hash’s new green movement, he brought his own mug to the hash. A coffee mug. From which he then had to drink lots of free beer… oh, you clever devil you. I see what you did there.
- NEW SHOES VIOLATIONS – people wised up and did not wear new shoes. I’m very disappointed. Please stop telling virgins about this rule!!
And then there was a wondrous ceremony – a NAMING!
Well-deserved, and somewhat overdue (what, we have a lot of people!?) JUST HAYLEY was named. There were many good stories, apparently most of which involved her puking during sex, while reading about Pocahontas, her fave Disney movie. Options included Coverhurl, Clit Notes, Pocahcuntis, Cuma Cuma Chameleon, Mean Hurls and more. And then someone yelled “Don’t Stick Your Dick in Crazy” and it was all over. *Editing note* how “crazy” is going to be spelled remains to be seen. Jubilee will actually get the last word on that.
We managed to drink ALL THE BEER so, no macho mug this evening. It was off to Chadwicks, where yours truly blacked out at some point, but managed to get home and eventually (ok, a loooong while later) write this thing for you!
On-I forgot to tell you about the interpreter-on,
Colliteral Damage, EWH3 Scribe
PS!!! The interpreter was awesome – here’s hoping he cums back to the hash! Motor will probably continue to donate a shot o’ jamo or whatever!!