Hash Trash: EWH3# 756: The Pre-game the Beach Trail (WIEEEEE WEEKEND WARM-UP)

How do you start a whole weekend of hashing in Ocean City Maryland? By hashing on thursday of course. Hence the WEI Weekend Warm-Up hash. This prelude to debauchery began in at Tenleytown, The pack circled up at the corner of Fort Dr and Grant rd, with Plan B just a limp wristed stones throw away, driven and operated by Twinkle Twinkle  Little Cock and  1 if by Man, 2 if by She.

Our GM for the evening Dont ask Dont Smell opened up the evening welcoming everyone and introducing almost enough virgins to start a new hash all together. Just Griffin, Steve, Maggie, Gwen, Travis, Aron, Aleek, Gina, Chelsey, and Ben. There were a handful of visitors present From Stumptown H3 Rip Van Tinkle and  Stinky in my Ass. Sir South in My Mouth and Chew Cocka from Bahrain.Pleasure me Orally from Key West. The Hare representatives Lemon Party Pooper and Fart of Darkness hen explained how then hares would start off this weekend long hash shenanigans and began a song about a man in a factory of buttons, the pack was then off.

After a brief stop for a beverage the pack once again located Plan B in the area of Fort Reno Park. Beverages were imbibed the pack mingled and the Religious Advisor for the night Cock-a-Doodle-Do-Me circled up the crowd with just unknown to me handing out beverages to violators. The hares were violated for the sh!tty trail.

We then harassed the visitors because there were actually enough to have some fun with.  Rip Van Tinkle helped Stinky in my Ass (both from Stump town) and sang us a song from thier home hash. Rip Van Tinkle then showed the crowed the way to second base. Sir South in My Mouth from Bahrain, thought comparing a harriet to a catfish had some relavance and humor, it was lost on the harriets though.Chew Cocka showed the crowd how far his sweater went,(thanks for leaving it on), and Pleasure me Orally from Key West also sang to the crowd. Thanks for coming out!

Violations!!

• Leggs over Easy was violated for being hired out by another harriet to “test drive” a male hasher before WIE weekend.
• Wank like an Egyptian as he made his way through the at the time unnamed shot check, told another hasher his nick name for his penis is pickle. After he passed through the shot was called  “pickle juice” sorry to all the folks who got there after him, you may want to see your doctor this week.
• Cock Soup violated for having his birthday on a hashing day. Hashy Birthday!! Fuck You!!  nobody cares
• A Red River Runs Through It  was violated for asking hashers for child raising tips.
• Back Snatch (not to be out done by A Red River Runs Through It) was violated for possibly child endangerment. e.g. letting Tosh.Homo watch his child “for the right price” which after a short bartering session came down to a six pack of domestic beer.
• Excuse me is that your bag was violated after medical documents of hers were made public. A nurse at a clinic examining her ear was heard saying “I’ve never seen this before” after finding sparkles on her ear drum. Later in the week at an OBGYN the Dr, said ” I havent found this much glitter in one of these since Ke$ha ended her last summer tour.  (note: Excuse me is that your bag has since been renamed partially based on this story)

There were then a few violations form the crowd. Most notably a few vessels were returned to their right full owners Twinkle Twinkle little Cock and Humpty Humpty Homo although the vessels were encased in ice.

After some pre-WIE announcements we moved on to the solemn occasion of a naming!!! The lucky lady to spend a half hour on her knees for our entertainment(which is 29 min more than I usually need) was Just Laura, she is an architect whos biggest erection she ever had a hand in getting up was a 6 story hospital. She went to university at Syracuse and her favorite Disney movie was Pocahontas. She was a bit timid about letting the pack know about her skills the first time she got on her knees to “work” in the art room after school, but says she has improved since.There were a handful of honorable nominations but only one worthy of this hasher. For now and always, through out the world of hashing except (you know who you are) F#ck them!! Just Laura will be known as Frank Lloyd Bite. 

and every one was happy! The pack made their way to Guapo’s where large ghetto bottles of Mexican beers were imbibed.

ON- Hope you had fun at WIE, I stayed home and did my taxes -ON

EWH3 Scribe

Little Thunder Clap