EWH3# 834: The TaxiCab Lil’ Jon Tour Trail! 6:45 PM Thursday, June 12, 2014 – Potomac Ave Metro (Blue/Orange Line)

A Lesson Begins

Just walked to the small grove of hemlocks outside of the town. Jester had told him to be there at noon, but he had decided to get there early. He was excited, and wanted to impress the company that he would be running with.

As he came into clearing where the old stone bench sat, he was disappointed to see that DouseThyFlame, Willow, and Jester were already there, laughing loudly with mugs of ale. There went his plan to look good, he thought.

“Well look who it is!” shouted Willow. “Welcome! Did yeh bring everythin’ we told yeh to?”

Just’s face dropped and panic begin to settle in. He began to rack his brain. What had he been told to bring? He couldn’t remember Jester telling him anything other than the time and place. What had he forgot? Already he was looking like an ass. “I, uh,” he fumbled. “Er, I didn’-”

The three burst out laughing. “It’s too easy!” DouseThyFlame choked between big laughs. “Yeh really brought us a fresh one, Jester!”

“Everyone starts fresh, Douse,” she replied. “Even if it was so long ago you cannot remember!” She winked at him. “Just- you’re fine. We don’t bring anything except for sharp eyes when we Scout. But don’t mistake their jokes for a lack of knowledge. When it comes to today, I need you to listen carefully to everything they say.”

“Correct, young Just.” Willow said, in an overtly formal tone. “Everything.” He winked and laughed. “Are you ready to run?” He looked at Just, suddenly serious.

“Yes,” Just replied.

“Great. Let us begin. Follow us, and we will explain as we go.”

They set off into the woods in a line at a brisk clip, Willow up front, followed by Jester, Douse, and Just tailing behind.

Your regularly scheduled program this week is:

EWH3# 834: The TaxiCab Lil’ Jon Tour Trail! 6:45 PM Thursday, June 12, 2014 – Potomac Ave Metro (Blue/Orange Line)

Your hares humbly submit the EWH3 entry to the 2014 Tour duh Hash:

Everyone get your favorite taxi cab app ready, because you’re going to need help getting home after you turn up for this week’s trail, inspired by Lil’ Jon himself.  Yup, it’s time to get UberCrunk, so keep your volume at 11, because, honestly, is there a reason to turn down??????

When: 6:45 PM Thursday June 12, 2014. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Potomac Ave Metro (Blue/Orange Line). Follow marks to the start!

Hares: Miss Me Gag Me, Yule Log, St. Pauli’s Girl, Whiskey Business, Just Carl

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is live A to A through the glorious New Hill East neighborhood. PI risk is low to non-existent (unless you like to zen), risk of fun is high. If a headlamp makes you feel warm and fuzzy, bring it. Pack light- it’s warm so how much clothes do you really need? Be smart, have fun. YEAH!

Last trains out of the Potomac Ave Metro:

Franconia-Springfield – 11:51 PM
Largo Town Center – 12:19 AM
New Carrollton – 12:19 AM
Vienna/Fairfax-GMU – 11:51 PM
WeatherH86L70Winds SSE at 10mph. Chance of rain 50%, scattered thunderstorms
On On On
1420 Pennsylvania Ave SE
Washington, DC 20003

Specials: $11 pitchers, TBD food, the potential for softball teams to be there for us to have totally awesome interactions with, and fun!


(1) Save the Date: EWH3 Pubcrawl is Saturday, July 12! More details to follow, but generally speaking, you’re in for a day-drinking bonanza of fun!

(2) H4 Full Moon Party Bus 2.0 on July 11th! Here we go again! After the July Full Moon trail, get on the bus for a wild ride to & from three clubs/bars. Each party bus will include music, lights, stripper poles, and wankers are allowed to bring their own “beverages” in resealable plastic containers for the bus. Don’t forget your ID! We are also allowed to leave bags on the bus, but you do so at your own risk. Price includes Full Moon trail, party bus, and hot food (provided by the bar at On-In after trail). Full details & rego here! -https://store.hashspace.com/product.php?productid=17011

(3) The WH4 Camp Out will be July 25-27 in Rileyville, VA! For those of you not making the trek across the pond to Brussels, come join EWH3’s mother hash during their annual camp out. Rego includes multiple trails, all the beer you can drink, food, and TUBING! For more info, visit the WH4 website or Rego here!

(4) The 2014 DC Red Dress Run is open for registration and you can register here! This event does sell out, so register now!

(5) The Pudjam Party (party for all the DC-area hashes) is on June 21st, 2014 @ 8PM! $20 for just the party and all proceeds will go to the Gary Sinise Foundation. There will also be seven trails throughout the weekend that will be centrally located around the party. Cost per trail is set by the kennel or you can buy the hash addict deal (party & all the trails) for $47! Party location is Dude, That Guy’s house at 12417 Arrow Park Ct., Fort Washington, MD 20744. Rego here!

(6)Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Give back to the hash! Trails need hare-ing! You wankers need to start looking into the summer, so check the hareline and then email me to reserve a date. (ewh3harerazor@gmail.com)

(7) Thirsty after work Friday? Check out the most-always metro friendly Beltway Bob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.org/community/beltwaybob/ Tell them you’re from EWH3 and then drink everyone under the table.

(8) If you have NEVER hared before and want to jump on to some already established trails, shoot me an email and I will hook you up!