Hash Trash: EWH3 #845: The Van Ness Has Shiggy Trail!
When: 6:45 PM Thursday August 21, 2014.
Where: Van Ness Metro.
Hares: Tuck Tuck Deuce, Red Vag of Courage, Put It Out, Bare Back, Just Liz, and a Mystery Hare.
Weather: Muggy muggy muggy
On On On: Public Bar
Virgins: Just Michela, Just Chris, Just Dorothee, Just Matt, Just Teresa, Just Andy, Just Emily, Just Max, Just Aristhide, Just Ryan, Just Drew, Just Jessica, Just Mark
Visitors: Bucky Bear – Nittany Valley H3
And, as always, your VIOLATIONS!!!
Upon hearing that her birthday present was a nine inch dildo, You Sucked My Battledick politely requested something smaller, more average. Which is really good news for the bulk of you and your bulk.
Carmen San Dieg-ho was overheard saying on trail “im not really wet as much as I am sticky.” Married people problems?
Just Dorothy has hashed in Senegal and the Congo, and still said that ewh3 is the hardest, most shiggiest trail she’s ever run. Yeah…
Dr. Bare Back recently moved back to the US after getting her PhD in epidemiology. And after all the recent outbreaks of Ebola, polio, malaria and chikungunya, our very own doctor who specializes in contagious disease ran us through mosquito infested swamp land. I know you’re currently fun employed but that’s just a low blow.
(^ me when someone tells me there’s a mosquito biting me ^)
Hells Anal was overheard talking about how her ideal night contains “college frat boys and fireball.” Emphasis on the plural here.
PIO sent out an email asking the hash to bring him “the lame and injured.” In other words, there’s an opening for cabana boy at Chez Peow and he’s looking for a new gimp.
(Special consideration if you resemble Agador)
Schrodinger’s Cock was overheard exclaiming, “I’ve never been so wet in my life!” I don’t think you’re doing it right.
And the event we’ve all been waiting for… A NAMING!
Just Liz attended the University of Mary Washington as a Colonial, works for the Department of Agriculture, and gives amazing blow jobs. The meanest thing she’s ever done was to deprive a 36-year old, micropenised virgin the loss of his V Card. While in undergrad, she got sexually intimate with her female roommate of two years, culminating in every hasher’s dream: a lesbian undergraduate pillow fight. While “pillow fighting,” however, Just Liz managed to break her wrist. Some names were thrown out, the best of which were A Prairie Home Companion, WhOrange is the New Black, and Gapes of Wrath. It was a close call, but our RA broke the tie, proclaiming that, henceforth and forevermore, Just Liz will be known as Gapes of Wrath.
On- jello wrestling over pillow fights any day- on,