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It’s long past Valentine’s Day and it’s time to screw all that touchy feely stuff V Day brings with it, and just hate fuck the shit out of something! Hey, that sounds like the perfect theme for a trail!?

 

Allow us, your hares, to lay you -I mean- to lay a trail that you will hate fuck the whole way through.

 

You’ll probably hate it, but will secretly look back and love the entire calamity of it all. Trail may even have some dark secluded spots if you find yourself feeling really randy and want to have a go at dirty hobo secks!

 

When: 6:45 PM Thursday February 26th, 2015. Pack away at 7:15!

 

Where: Minnesota Ave metro. Exit on Minnesota Ave side. Follow marks to start!

 

Hares: Penis Fly Trap, Dial F, Sorest Rump, Colliteral Damage, Roll Over Bitch!

 

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A. Expect shiggy (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=shiggy. Bring a cranium lamp. Penis Fly Trap says, “dry bag or die”, because it’s cold and who knows if you may want a change of shoes, panties, dignity, or self respect after trail. Again BRING A CRANIUM LAMP or you’ll be sorry. Not dog friendly Don’t wear your favorite shoes or r*nning clothes. If you do then I’ll know you didn’t read this and Penis will point at you and laugh! It should be a cold night so pack smartly and bring a headlamp and mug! Be smart, have fun.

 

Turkeys and eagles will get their feet wet. And if you’re a lover of shiggy, definitely do the eagle. Bring a change of shoes/socks/clothes this week!

 

Last trains out of Minnesota Ave:

 

New Carrollton – 12:25 AM

Vienna/Fairfax-GMU – 11:46 AM

 

On After:

DC Eagle

3701 Benning Rd NE

Washington, DC 20019

 

Specials: Everything is a dildo if you try hard enough. Specials TBD!