When: March 5, 2016
Where: Castle by the Sand Hotel, Ocean City
Hares: All Flash No Drive, Head Injury, Glitty Clitty Gang Bang, S&Mom, HHH, Twinkle, St. Pauli’s Girl, Kindergarten Cock, Mambo # Hives
Virgins: Just Valerie
Visitor: Pittsburgh sent us Glitty Titty Gangbang, Lips of Steel and Spermit
On-After: The Be-aaaach.
Trail was… well it was Ocean City, what do you want? Ballbusters ran out … did some stuff with peeps … ran back and picked up the rest of the pack! Mimosa people were loaded onto a bus, walkers wandered on out after HHH and the rest of us did some weaving around buildings and even a tiny bit of beach running.
Libations at beer check were a solidly low OC price and much appreciated! Some cheerleaders on the TVs had hashers fascinated and confused by the funny feelings.
In all of that, you wankers did some stupid shit. And here’s a sampling!
In circle, Cum Dumpling made sure to admonish people to stay out of the hotel’s kitchen. Repeatedly. So much we can only conclude he was trying to get hashers into HIS kitchen.
As trail was ready to take off, Pulp Friction looked up at his femme roomies and plaintively was heard to say “what, wait – are we running trail!? I thought I did ballbusters!” You did half chihuahua, you did half…
On trail, Dial F took a pole to the face, Cum locker took a shot to the ass, Vladimir Fruitin didn’t like the “fishy smell” and Poopdick took directions from muggles and ran a couple extra miles. Twinkle’s mustache. Period. Oh, and then he tried to give children Peeps. With that mustache.
NOT ON TRAIL: Aunt Vagina, Daisy Chain and Battledick.
After trail it was discovered that All Flash and Tuck both had bloody knuckles from pounding pussy, Yule Log had been sober enough to judge others for being drunk, Sphincter laid a boob check in the middle of the hashpitality suite… Whoregon was not amused… until she saw some boobs and then all was forgiven!!
Finally, amidst the smoke and flames and hot dogs and shared Jack… we had a couple of namings!!
Just Kristen is an attorney who likes Ariel and pigs, once pushed someone in a patriots jersey, lost her virginity in a one night stand, might have made out with a cousin, definitely made out with a ginger vampire and once rescued HHH from DCA jail. There were many good names including Welcum to Brown Town and Gang Bang Cock, but in the end, the hash will forever know her as Turning Tricks is for Kids!!!
Just Dan is married to Twatterboarding and started hashing before she did… I guess we like her more. He was a virgin when he met Twatter and has apparently only had sexual experiences with her. He does, however, pick up hitch hikers and thinks child locks are a bitch. He likes anal porn and let’s all remember – he dresses as the battlecat Kringer. And therefore – without much ado, the hash dubbed him Power of Gayskull!!
And then we got too drunk to name anyone else, despite some valiant efforts.
Naps were had, then on to dinner and singing (really really well) and the rest… well, go look at hash flash if you need to be reminded.