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We’ve been doing this for seven years, you guys know the drill by now. Show up wearing anything OTHER THAN clothes, get rewarded with FOUR shot checks! Twinkle has already pre-ordered a case of handles of Everclear, and the bag wine is soon to be purchased. If you’ve got flextime, you may want to take Friday off.

We can’t wait to see you in your crafty outfits, but don’t worry if you’re not creative! Here are some tips for you last minute types who still don’t have an outfit: a pillowcase with two holes in it makes great underwear; sure a sheet can be a toga, but so can curtains or a table cloth; duct tape is not only a fastener, but you can make your whole outfit out of it; if you wrap plastic wrap around yourself more than three times it becomes (mostly) opaque; and lastly, naked technically counts as not wearing clothes, and is legal in DC.

-The Hares

When: 6:45 PM Thursday September 15th, 2016. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: L’Enfant Metro Maryland Avenue and 7th exit – follow marks to start!

Hares: Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock, Red Vag of Courage, Mouthful of Clam, Red White and Poo, Just Philbrick, and Texas Hold Him

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B. Dog friendly as long as they don’t wear clothes. It should be a gorgeous night to run without clothing. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

Last trains out of Federal Center (Orange/Silver/Blue):

Franconia-Springfield – 11:46 PM
Largo Town Center – 12:13 AM
New Carrollton – 12:01 AM
Vienna/Fairfax-GMU – 11:57 PM
Wiehle-Reston East – 11:33 PM

Last trains out of Waterfront metro (Green):

Branch Ave – 12:15 AM
Greenbelt – 11:41 PM (No Red Line Transfer Possible)

Metro Alerts and Advisories:
SafeTrack Surge #9
Red Line: Every 20-25 minutes. Single tracking between Dupont Circle & Farragut North. Single tracking between Silver Spring & Wheaton.
Orange Line: Every 20-25 minutes. Single tracking between West Falls Church & Vienna. SafeTrack Surge 9 Continuous single tracking weekdays between Vienna and West Falls Church.
Silver Line: Regular weeknight service
Blue Line: 20-25 minutes. Single tracking between Stadium-Armory & Addison Road
Yellow Line: 20-25 minutes. Single tracking between Mt. Vernon Square & U Street
Green Line: 20-25 minutes. Single tracking between Mt. Vernon Square & U Street

On After: Big Stick

Specials: Specials TBD