EWH3 Hash Trash #975: The Unst Unst Unst Trail!
When: November 17, 2016
Where: Pentagon City Metro (Yellow / Blue Line)
Hares: Atari 6900, Twater Boarding, Justs Jai, Duc, Franny, Hanna, and Mouthful of Clam
Virgins: Just Glen
Visitor: 1 Trick Dick (Utica, NY)
On-After: Freddie’s Beach Bar
Violations:
- Poor Just Glen had to lose his virginity without any lubrication, alcoholic or otherwise. womp
- The Greatest Ho On Earth showed up eating a bag of freshly harvested greens. First of all, you should know by now that we don’t eat things that aren’t orange at the hash and secondly, if you eat like a bunny, do you fuck like one too? Asking for a friend…
- Orianal Express got lost on trail and instead of calling out “are you?” or asking the sweeper, he decided to phone a friend. Specially, his grandma. Because if there’s anyone that knows how to use geolocation technology to help you find your way, it’s a grandmother.
- Atari 6900 showed up to trail with an entire trapper keeper of color coded and paper clipped maps to organize everything. Take it down a notch bruh, it’s the hash, not the first day of honor society.
- The hares wore pink mustaches because they were running for Lyft. I’d give that trail 1 star.
And there was no booze and no naming. To the bar! With a quick stop by the dumpsters in the alley on the way there. (For drinking, not peeing, to be clear.)
On – *sings Sandstorm a cappella* – on,
Stain Gretzky