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When: November 17, 2016

Where:  Pentagon City Metro (Yellow / Blue Line)

Hares:  Atari 6900, Twater Boarding, Justs Jai, Duc, Franny, Hanna, and Mouthful of Clam

Virgins:  Just Glen

Visitor:  1 Trick Dick (Utica, NY)

On-After:  Freddie’s Beach Bar

Violations:

  • Poor Just Glen had to lose his virginity without any lubrication, alcoholic or otherwise. womp
  • The Greatest Ho On Earth showed up eating a bag of freshly harvested greens. First of all, you should know by now that we don’t eat things that aren’t orange at the hash and secondly, if you eat like a bunny, do you fuck like one too?  Asking for a friend…
  • Orianal Express got lost on trail and instead of calling out “are you?” or asking the sweeper, he decided to phone a friend. Specially, his grandma.  Because if there’s anyone that knows how to use geolocation technology to help you find your way, it’s a grandmother.
  • Atari 6900 showed up to trail with an entire trapper keeper of color coded and paper clipped maps to organize everything. Take it down a notch bruh, it’s the hash, not the first day of honor society.
  • The hares wore pink mustaches because they were running for Lyft. I’d give that trail 1 star.

And there was no booze and no naming.  To the bar!  With a quick stop by the dumpsters in the alley on the way there.  (For drinking, not peeing, to be clear.)

On – *sings Sandstorm a cappella* – on,

Stain Gretzky