When: January 19, 2017

Where:  Woodley Park-Zoo/Adams Morgan Metro (Red Line)

Hares:  All Flash No Drive!, Stain Gretzky, Moose Knuckles, Atari 6900, Schrodinger’s Cock, and Happy Poo Year!

Virgins:  Just CJ, Just Sandra, and a mystery Just who didn’t sign in

Visitors:  Juan Diego, Can’t Find Tail, The Whore of Sarajevo

On-After:  Town Tavern

Violations

  • Diddler on the Roofie misunderstood the trail’s theme and decided to pad his crotch instead of his shoulders
  • Unobtanium decided to spice up runner’s trail by playing “Just the Tip”
  • More Men was walking because of a stress fracture she got from her home stripper pole. For those interested in the fact she has a pole at home, you may want to refer to this FAQ on avoiding repetitive stress injuries
  • The hares weren’t violated because anyone who is too stupid to sign up for another term at mismanagement wouldn’t get the joke.

Following raucous rounds of rowdy ribaldry, we held a very solemn occasion for Just Brian. While an alumnus of Hamilton College, his sexual escapades certainly didn’t “Blow Us All Away”.  When Just Brian travels, he pretends to be Will Ferrell’s nephew, hoping “That Would Be Enough”. Turns out the ladies would “Say No to This”, and he’d have to go back to his hotel to his “Right Hand Man” to be “Satisfied.” “What Comes Next?” On the theory that he was less  “Aaron Burr, Sir” and more “The Schuyler Sisters”, he shall now be known as No one puts Gayby in the Corner.

On – “Wait for It” – on,

Texas Hold Him