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His name is Gispert
I have a dream about him
He makes me squirt
And satisfies my every whim
Oh how he rocks
In those shiggy socks
But he doesn’t know who I am
And he doesn’t give a damn about me

Cause I’m just a hashing dirtbag baby.
I’m just a drunken hasher, baby.
Down-down this lukewarm, flat beer, baby
With me

When: 6:45 PM, Thursday August 23rd, 2018. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Gallery Place (Green, Yellow, Red Lines – avoid the red line if you can by taking the D6, G8, 70, X2, 80, 42 or P6 bus) – exit at 9th and G. Follow marks to the Portrait Gallery to start!

Hares: Poon-apple Juice, Atari 6900, Mourning Wood, Throbbin’ Hood, No Strings Attached

How Far: This trail is short, like your skirts. First half is about 2 miles, second half is about 1 mile. Walker’s trail is roughly half the distance of runner’s.

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B-ish. Remember that the bug spray needs to go up your skirt, too. It should be a nice night. Kilts aren’t skirts! Pack smartly and bring a lamp & mug! Be smart, have fun, listen to Iron Maiden.

Last trains out of:
Union Station (0.5 miles from on-after):
https://www.wmata.com/rider-guide/stations/union-station.cfm
(Take it with a grain of salt, because of track work)
Gallery Place (0.8 miles from on-after):
https://www.wmata.com/rider-guide/stations/gallery-place.cfm

On After:
Hamilton’s Bar & Grill
233 2nd St NW

Specials:
Miller High Life… $3.50
House WIne… $7.00
The opportunity to make unsuspecting kickball players uncomfortable… Priceless