EWH3 Hash Trash #1148: The Choose Your Adventure Trail!

When: Thursday, October 10, 2019

Regular Trail 

  • Minnesota Ave (Orange) @ 6:45 pm
  • Hares: Wait Wait Don’t Fuck Me… etc.!
  • Virgins: Just Andy
  • Visitors: AARPenis, Fister Roboto, Drillbert, Moremen Pukes Tonight

Ballbuster Trail

  • Capitol Heights (Blue) @ 5:30 pm
  • Hares: All Flash No Drive, Special Head Kid, Goldman Ballsachs, By the Power of Gayskull, Quid Pro Blow
  • Virgins: Just Allen
  • Visitors: Six From Behind (from Syracuse!)

On-After:  DC Eagle

Violations from Double Scribe Tag Team on top of a pile of dirt under a bridge aka Slut Mountain

  • La Gingeracha brought a trio of rubber chickens to trail for BB.  Not only was he caught choking them at beer check, he also got the new kids to put them into their pants making it the first time in 2019 someone touched LG’s cock.
  • Just Allen asked someone where he should put his cock.  I think either of our RAs were available, frankly.
  • You Can’t Handle The Poop nearly ran over a muggle exiting a library on trail.  We get it bro, you’re swole, doesn’t mean you need to body slam nerds to prove it.
  • Quid Pro Blow took it into a hole on trail and ended up all bloody.  Good to know he’s into period sex.
  • Beer check for the ballbusters was next to some soiled mattresses in the bushes.  Wow, RDR committee really splashed out for the hotel this year!
  • SchroCo was the perviest recipient of a tit check, looking around like Golem trying to find his previous.
  • Just Arthur was violated for nearly killing an old ass muggle on the Anacostia River Trail in the dark.  He was definitely confused with last week’s trail – it was supposed to be in Hyattsville on the Florida Man trail that we bumped off some old people.
  • What’s A Boner was reliving his WIE BB fantasy where he found a deer skull in the woods by chasing down a live deer so that he could affix its skull to his crotch.
  • AARPenis skipped a fish hook, ignoring Edub tradition.  It’s true what they say, without rules we’re all just a bunch of old dicks.
  • The ballbuster hares were violated for being the most Type A uptight DC hares for having a minute-by-minute tick tock for their trail.  They shortened it but it was still long enough for me and I give it a perfect 10 (miles). Also, I was WEARING NEW SHOES the whole time and nobody noticed.  Bwahahaha!!!

No naming, but it was leather night at DC Eagle so I’m sure someone ended up on their knees in the middle of a circle of people.

On – nice day for a red wedding – on,

Stain Gretzky & #SquadHoles