EWH3 HASH TRASH #1239 The Beer is Near Trail!

When: Thursday, June 3, 2021

Where: Potomac Ave Metro 

Visitors: Sadly none…for now!

Virgins: Just Marley!

Hares: Lorena Hobbit, Special Red and Roll Over, Bitch!

This trail was supposed to be about keeping the beer near and PBRs (Personal Best Records) so here we go with some PBRs set by the pack that night:

Most Thunder heard on/before trail (We like to live dangerously.) 

Buffy The Vampire Slayer Leo GIF

Most soggy hashers on a June trail (probably a lie, but prove it)

Largest underground Go-Go Party to ever be crashed (H/t, Hares!) 

Most pierced nipples on trail (or were those just tiny, C shaped lightning rods?)

Most washed away check marks on trail… (stupid June showers…)

Most Long Time no see-ers?! You bet! Much like Brood X, we had dozens of hashers crawl out of the mud and wood work this week. Thanks in part to the siren call of newly reopened Trusty’s. (and an 88% vaccinated pack.) They prelubed, post lubed and were merry! Nature is healing…

Animation Domination High-Def Gif By gif

Now onto specific violations and general tom foolery. 

Gingersnatch and Special Red were violated for jocking each other’s style… Though those ewh3 tanks did look good on them, you know what they say- The gingers that listen to NPR together, stay together. 

Chale Why was violated for attempting to compete with the sky and also shower us on trail. Look, that’s not what the harriettes meant by getting wet on trail today! Red Roper was violated for making a couple of hashers almost pass out at beer check when he took his shirt off…Did I spy the RA grow nervous for the lightning risk it posed? (See above)

Sci Fi Lol GIF by Hallmark Gold Crown

Just Nele was violated for doing her best neutron impression by running up to Ready Player None asking again, “How much is hash cash?” He replied, “For you? No Charge!”

Was the scribe grasping for straws this week? The scribe was DEFINITELY grasping for straws.

And finally, PSA stepped in (rather than away, heh) as the day’s hash curmudgeon when he was overheard going on and on about how he would hash more but the trails have just gotten too damn long. Hey buddy, never look at your beer as half empty, look at it as you’re halfway to your next beer!

It Is Over The End GIF by Your Happy Workplace
Alright, alright… I can hear all your groans from here.

On-Be funnier next time-On,

s/Kooter Kunte