EWH3 #1310: The Jurassic Fart Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, August 25, 2022- L’Enfant Plaza Metro (Green/ Orange/ Blue/ Silver Lines)

As the CDC and DC Health continue to update and revise guidelines, Mismanagement is working to determine how the hash fits into these recommendations. For this reason, masks are optional for fully vaccinated individuals. Vessels are still required for everyone. 

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[cue iconic John Williams score]

Join your living fossils hares on an exciting journey to prehistoric times, when hash trails went places you haven’t seen or gotten drunk in a dozen times already. Beware flying pteroDICKtyls, fierce velociFAPtors, gargantuan brontoSORE-ASSes, and the mighty TIT-T-Rex! How did we fit in such an epic trail, right in the heart of the Metro system? Come find out this Thursday!

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO (link).

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, August 25, 2022. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!

Where: L’Enfant Plaza – Hancock Park (7th & Maryland exit); unfortunately, the 7th & Maryland exit is undergoing escalator replacement, so you’ll have to find your way there aboveground from one of the other exits.  

Nearest Capital Bike Share: L’Enfant Plaza / 7th & C St SW

Hares: Pinocchi-Ho, Wookin Pa Nub, Agent Orgy, Sorest Rump, and maybe a sexy Jeff Goldblum*!

Trail Details:
– Runners: < 5 miles

– Walkers: < 3 miles

– Shiggy: Grass, asphalt, mulch, concrete, maybe a little mud, shopping mall, and possibly modern-dino (bird) excrement – watch your step!

– Cat costumes are also welcum! – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W85oD8FEF78

-Bug spray would be a good idea.

– * sexy Jeff Goldblum not included


Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’ (0.4 miles to metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun. Yellow Line: No train svc btwn Pentagon & Greenbelt (i.e. this station) due to prep work for rehab project. No shuttles. Use BL/GR Line as alternate.

End Metro: L’Enfant Plaza Metro (Green/Orange/Blue/Silver Lines)

Last Trains Out:

Branch Ave 12:13 AM
Franconia-Springfield 11:53 PM
Greenbelt 12:13 AM
Huntington 11:59 PM
Largo Town Center 12:11 AM
Stadium-Armory 11:56 PM
Vienna/Fairfax-GMU 11:59 PM
Wiehle-Reston East 11:51 PM

On After*: Tiki TNT & Potomac Distilling Company. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place. 

Specials: $9 beer night! Ok, the Miller Lites are *only* $6. Late-night owls need something open later? Continue on down to Kirwan’s (749 Wharf St SW) until 2am!

*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.

Upcoming Events and Announcements!

  • Save the Date September 17th: EWH3 Hare and Brew Crew Party. Do you want free beer and food while getting some experience honing your hare and brew crew skills? Then save the date, more details to come!
  • D.C. Beer Mile: September 16th
  • D.C. Red Dress: October 8th
  • EWH3 is STILL in need of a NEW BREWMEISTER. If you are interested in being the BEER SUPERHERO we all need, please reach out to a member of mismanagement!

Give Back to the Hash!  

  • BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
  • ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. 

Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!