EWH3 #1473: Fuck My Tatas Birthday Trail, June 19, 2025, Cleveland Park (Red)

EWH3 #1473: Fuck My Tatas Birthday Trail, June 19, 2025, Cleveland Park (Red)

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Once upon a time, back in the year 2001, the baby that would one day be known as How Much Wood Could a Woodchuck Fuck entered the world, kicking, screaming, and probably thirsty for a beer.

On the very same date, [redacted] years before, Ha-Cum-On My Tatas also joined us on this giant ball of molten rock we call Earth. Within her first year of life, a 12-pack of beer was [allegedly] dropped on her head, explaining both her passion for the beverage and comfort among such a large group of half minds.

In honor of these two historical events, join us for a celebratory run/walk/stumble through Rock Creek Park, featuring your birthday babes, beer (definitely), and jello shots (maybe).

Prelube and end will both be at Lyman’s because **birthday queens drink free**.

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD.

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, June 19, 2025. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!

Where: Cleveland Park metro (Alleyway next to 2755 Ordway St NW)

Nearest Capital Bike Share: Connecticut Ave & Ordway St NW / Cleveland Park Metro

Hares: Chuck Fuck, Ha-Cum-On My Tatas, mystery hares

Trail Details:
– Runners: 1.8 mi. first half / 2.4 mi. second half

– Walkers: 0.8 mi first half / 1.3 mi. second half

– Shiggy: 3.69


Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to Z (0.5 mi to Georgia Ave-Petworth Metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light (for walkers, too!), bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.

WE ALSO HAVE A BAG VAN FOR ALL THE FUCKS YOU WANNA LEAVE IN IT

End Metro: Georgia Ave-Petworth

Last Trains Out: Branch Ave – 11:46 PM; Greenbelt – 12:27 AM

On After*: Lyman’s

Specials: Chuck Fuck and Tatas drink free because we’re special*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.

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Upcumming Trails: 

  • 06/26/25 – Sir Lancelittle & Friends! – Huntington/Eisenhower (Yellow)
  • 07/3/25 – Ph.D., Just Chris, VagLaw, Tatas, RPN – Fuck the 4th Trail – Old Town Alexandria/ Waterfront (Blue/ Yellow)
  • 07/10/25 – Anal Spice Girls Trail! – Burlington Ho Factory & Friends Eastern Market (Blue/Silver/Orange)
  • 07/17/25 – Special Red and Friends! – Location TBD

Upcoming Events & Announcements!

– EWH3 PUB CRAWL!!! SATURDAY JUNE 12th, 2025. Cum be blessed be thy Holy spirits 😉 Rego available here!


– SummerWEEEEENN!!!!! Come join our friends over at White House for a fright filled weekend at The Nightmare before Campout! Rego Here!

– AAARRRRGGG MATEY! Why is the rum always gone?! Well lucky for us, beer is never short of supply! Cum be a real pirate by spending the night at DC Full Moons Pirate Boat Cruise! Rego here

– Want to see all the dumb shit you did on trail? You can find all those trashyy moments here!: https://www.flickr.com/photos/ewh3/albums/ pictures updated weekly!

Even YOU can drink for free (at trail) on your bday when you sign up to hare! 😉

You don’t need to be named to hare trail! Find a named hasher to show you the ropes! Open Hare Dates are as follows:

  • August 21st, 2025
  • September 11th, 2025
  • September 25th, 2025
  • October 2nd, 2025
  • October 9th, 2025
  • October 16th, 2025
  • October 23rd, 2025 – January 8th, 2026

Give Back to the Hash!  

  • BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
  • HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
  • ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.