New Year’s was almost a month ago and just staying home is getting, well, dull. Luckily, your hares have a tropical-themed festival trail to keep you warm on what is, statistically, D.C.’s coldest day of the year. Some people call your hares the Big Kahunas of Hashing. Some people call D.C. the Honolulu of the Mid-Atlantic. Some people say, screw it, I want a drink with a tiny umbrella and a fruit salad on top! Dig out your coconut bra, grass skirt, ukulele, longboard, can o’ SPAM, and pineapple – still no tiki torches, please – for a fun night straight out of Paul Gauguin’s fever dreams!
If you’re too young to know who this is, I’mma tell you it’s Paul Gauguin.
Where: Foggy Bottom Metro – follow marks to start in Washington Circle!
Hares: Pinocchi-Ho, Vagina is for Lawyers, Tie Me Up Before You Go-Go, Cock Whisperer, Just Colby, and Ready Player None
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp (again, no tiki torches!) & mug! Be smart, have fun.
How Far: Runners’ trail will be approximately 4.6 miles long (about 2.1 miles first half and 2.5 miles second half). Walkers’ trail is roughly half that (1mi and 1.3mi).
Last trains out of Foggy Bottom:
Ashburn – 12:01 AM
Largo – 12:00 AM
Franconia – 12:03 AM
Huntington – 12:07 AM
New Carrollton – 11:54 PM Vienna/FFX-GMU – 12:09 AM
On After: The Tombs, 1226 36th St NW
Specials: $15 Shock Top pitchers after 10pm __________________________________
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2023-01-25 23:59:592023-01-26 11:06:59EWH3 1333: The Maui Wowie Luau Party Trail! – January 26, 2023 – Foggy Bottom (Blue/Orange/Silver)
Welcum one and all to the latest and greatest 2023 Everyday is Wednesday Mismanagement? We’re here to show you wankers how it’s done and kick off this year right with a trail hared by the shining new faces of this year’s misman. We have a van full of beer, songs in our hearts, and nothing to lose so cum out to trail and see the spectacle yourselves!
YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO (https://hashrego.com/events/ewh3-1331). We will begin allowing cash collection as of next week. Thank you for your patience as we (new MM) get settled.
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, January 19th, 2023. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Shaw/Howard Metro – 7th Street Entrance
Nearest Capital Bike Share: 7th & S St NW
Hares: Burlington Ho Factory, This Little Piggy Goes to Ballsack, Tie Me Up Before You Go-Go, and Head Injury
Trail Details: – Runners: 2.12 mi. first half / 2.02 mi. second half – Walkers: 1.10 mi. first half / 1.04 mi. second half – Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B (0.4 miles to metro)]. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun.
End Metro: Georgia Ave-Petworth Last Trains Out: – Branch Ave (Green): 11:43 PM – Greenbelt (Green): 12:26 AM
On After*: The Midlands Beer Garden Specials: You’re Special *On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements! Save the date for WIE! Weekend of March 31, 2023.
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2023-01-17 22:34:052023-01-18 22:19:54EWH3 1332: The Incumming Mismanagement Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, January 19, 2022 – Shaw/Howard Metro (Green Line)
Your 2022 misman team started the year with a half ass “AGM” on a cold omicron filled night under a bridge with mediocre shots and lukewarm taco bell. After that, did you actually expect a calendar full of trails and beer this year? We had a few hashes, mostly in the same five places, and we sometimes had brew crew. We are all looking forward to what the new misman wankers have in store for you in 2023 – please help them and the hash out by signing up now for your choice of 2023 hare and brew crew dates:
Join your 2022 misman this Thursday for one last brisk jaunt around Brookland. And signup for this Saturday’s AGM you f*&king fuc%s (see link in announcements below).
(Who gave me the ability to post announcements and not expect at total trainwreck?!?
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, January 12, 2023. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Brookland/CUA – Follow marks to start under Michigan Ave bridge
Nearest Capital Bike Share: 10th & Monroe St NE
Hares: Assorted mismanaging wankers who may include but may not be limited to Lickthyologist, Cum Dumpling, Head Injury, and Red Roper
Trail Details: – Runners: 3.5 miles
– Walkers: 1.9 miles
– Shiggy: 1.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A.Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun. End Metro: Brookland/CUA (Red)
Last Trains Out:
Glenmont 12:19 AM
Shady Grove 11:51 PM
On After*: Brookland Pint. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place.
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Our Anal General Meeting is just one week away and your committee has some exciting updates for you.
Due to a New World Order, there has been a venue change. We will now gather at Astro Beer Hall in Metro Center. Your rego still includes two+ hours of open bar and snacks. This new venue will allow for bottomless gluten-free options for all!
Now is the time to place your nominations for EWH3 Superlatives. Use the Google Form here to submit your nominations by Thursday at 11:59 PM. The final winners will be chosen through a vote by AGM attendees. You will receive a voting link at sign-in.
Schedule:
8:30 PM – Doors Open
9:00 PM – Open Bar Begins
9:15 PM – Voting for Superlative Closes
9:30 PM – Circle
11:00 PM – Last Call for Open Bar
11:30 PM – Final Bell
Bring your A-game, a credit card for additional food or shots, and cash to tip the bartenders. You will need an ID. No nudity will be permitted at this event.
Online regos close on Thursday, January 12 at 11:59 PM. After this, day-of regos will be available at the door for $42. Don’t delay, Rego now!
On – OH MY GOD IS THAT TURD KIND WITH A STEEL CHAIR?! – On AGM Committee
The holidays are over and you’re still full from eating nothing but cheese for a week, but your hares are here to ease you into 2023 whether with a short run or bundle down in blankets. Make sure to bring your onesies, snuggies, and blankets.
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, January 5, 2023. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Union Station – Meet in front by the bell
Nearest Capital Bike Share: Columbus Circle across from the Thurgood Marshall Building
Hares: GeriatricMandering, Colliteral Damage, Bless Me Father for I Have Rimmed, & Split Her Bare
Trail Details: – Runners: 1.5 mi. first half / 2 mi. second half
– Walkers: .7 first half / .9 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A (1 block to metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun. End Metro: Union Station
Last Trains Out:
– Glenmont (Red): 12:12 am
– Shady Grove (Red): 11:58 pm
On After*: Union Pub. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place. There are indoor and outdoor options.
Specials: Pitcher specials
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2023-01-02 14:35:112023-01-02 14:35:15EWH3 #1329: The Return of the Snuggie Trail Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, January 5, 2023- Union Station (Red Line)
It’s been a long year, so let’s gather for a short trail.
Note: Due to the holiday, this is NOT a standard trail. Similar to Thanksgiving, you’ll be lucky to burn off a glass of champagne. You MUST bring your ID. Cash is highly recommended if you’d like a different drink at beer check or to tip your bartenders. There will be NO bag van OR runners option (you can always run to start).
Bring your A-game as we celebrate the resolutions that have cum and gone. Didn’t meet yours? No worries, we’ll have plenty of opportunities to cash in before the new year.
A guide to achieving some of the Top 50 New Year’s Resolutions:
– PR the hash – This walkers-route only trail is less than a mile long. A brisk power walk will help you meet this super attainable goal.
– Be more generous – Don’t be a Scrooge! Buy a shot for one of the hares at our bar-based beer checks.
– Support more local businesses – Over-tip your bar staff (the ones who really keep this city moving)!
– Volunteer more/Give back to the community – Everyday is Wednesday needs more martyrs like yourself. Sign up to hare or brew crew while you rego.
– Lose weight – Oh, hush! You’re beautiful just the way you are!
– Quit smoking – We’ll be inside for most of this trail, so no smoking allowed!
Hares: Poon-apple Juice, Burlington Ho Factory, Dry Rub
Trail Details: Walkers Option ONLY: The entire trail is 0.3 miles.
Shiggy Level: Zero. This is a glorified miniature pub crawl.
Miscellaneous Crap: Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is, for all intents and purposes A to A and is a non-traditional trail. Bring your ID, money for beer check(s), and (just the) tip! Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun.
7:05 – Choose-your-own-adventure Beer Check (ID required) – One hash sponsored beer will be provided! Bring an ID for any other buy-your-own drinks. Happy hour until 8:00 means specials and free popcorn for all!
7:40 – On out to second choose-your-own-adventure Beer Check (ID required), with one hash sponsored beer provided! Second beer check has a happy hour that ends at 8:00 SHARP, so move fast to get those $4 drinks.
8:30 – On out to in-bar “end circle.” We will provide beer for down-downs, but you are responsible for the rest of your beverages this evening.
** You MUST rego 24 hours before the event to guarantee you are included in the glutard count. Please be considerate and only select this option if you have a true gluten allergy.
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2022-12-26 12:30:252022-12-26 12:32:07EWH3 #1328: The Not Your Standard 2022 Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, December 29, 2022 – Gallery Place/Chinatown (Red, Yellow, Green Lines)
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 22, 2022. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Smithsonian Metro, Orange/Silver/Blue line
Nearest Capital Bike Share: Smithsonian-National Mall/ Jefferson Dr & 12th St SW
Hares: Lickthyologist, Geriatric Mandering, Roll Over Biatch, Sexually Anxious Disease, magical mystery hares
Trail Details: – Runners: 2 mi. first half / 2 mi. second half
– Walkers: 1 mi. first half / 1 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to Z. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun. End Metro: Farragut North (Red)
Last Trains Out:
Glenmont 12:02 AM
Shady Grove 12:08 AM
On After*: Recessions. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place.
Specials: The holidays are special.
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Harerazorhttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngHarerazor2022-12-20 12:45:012022-12-20 12:55:06EWH3 #1327: The Nightmare Before Christmas Trail! – 6:45 PM Thursday, December 22, 2022 – Smithsonian Metro (Orange, Silver, Blue Line)
On August 31, 2021, a dazzle of zebras liberated themselves from an Upper Marlboro farm to romp around the wilds of Maryland. On December 14, the zebras were captured. However, this week, we will honor their legacy!
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 15, 2022. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: NoMa Metro – FL Ave Exit
Nearest Capital Bike Share: 1st & M St NE
Hares: GeriatricMandering, Quid Pro Blow, Son, What th Fuck, Special Red, and This Little Piggy Went to the Ballsack
Trail Details: – Runners: 2.1 mi. first half / 2 mi. second half
– Walkers: .9 first half / .9 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B. (.8 miles to metro)]. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun. End Metro: Union Station
Last Trains Out:
– Glenmont (Red): 12:12 AM
– Shady Grove (Red): 11:58 PM
On After*: Kelly’s Irish Times If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place.
Specials: $5 Bud Lights, Yuenglings, House Wines, or Ciders.
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
Did you know that male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, but female reindeer don’t? So that ugly sweater you have of humping reindeer is a whole lot kinkier than you thought. And Thursday is your chance to wear it! That’s right, for the eighth year in a row, we are giving you the chance to wear your tackiest, ugliest, or most hideous holiday sweater on a winter wonderland romp!
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 8th, 2022. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Eastern Market Metro (Blue/Orange/Silver Line).
Nearest Capital Bike Share: Pennsylvania Ave SE & 8th St SE.
Hares: Head Injury, Just Kayla, & Mystery Hares
Trail Details: – Runners: 2.1 mi. first half / 2.1mi. second half
– Walkers: 1.1 mi first half / 1.1 mi. second half
– Shiggy: 0.69. Everyone loves alleys!!
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun! End Metro: Capitol South (Blue/Orange/Silver Line)
Last Trains Out:
Blue Line to New Carrollton: 12:05am
Blue Line to Largo Town Center: 12:14am
Blue Line to Huntington: 11:51pm
Silver Line to Ashburn: 11:45pm
Silver Line to Largo Town Center: 11:51pm
Orange Line to New Carrollton: 11:56pm
Orange Line to Vienna: 11:53pm
On After*: Walter’s Sports Bar
10 N St SE
Washington, DC 20003
If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place.
Specials: You are special.
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
EWH3 2023 AGM is January 14, 2023 – rego coming soon!
Save the date for WIE! Weekend of March 31, 2023.
Give Back to the Hash!
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.
When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 1, 2022. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!
Where: Woodley Park/Zoo Metro – across from Chipotle
Nearest Capital Bike Share: directly at start on Calvert & Connecticut NW
Hares: Turd Eye Blind, Just Cocoa, Milkbone #Hives, Screaming Puppy, and Son What the Fluff?!
Trail Details:
– Walkers: .8 mi. / .6 mi.
– Runners: 1.4 / 1.1 mi.
– Shiggy: 0.69
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A’. Bring your own vessel, a cranium lamp, and water. If you’re bringing a 4-legged bestie, bring their necessities – there’s likely water bowls at end but not guaranteed.
–>Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun.
End Metro: Woodley Park/Zoo (Red)
Last Trains Out: Glenmont: 11:57 PM / Shady Grove: 12:13 AM
On After*: Johnny Pistolas. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place.
There is an outdoor patio for the pups.
Specials: Your dog is the goodest dog! (All day yappy hour)
*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best human judgment to decide about your participation.
Upcoming Events & Announcements!
Want to give back to the hash in a big way? Think you can run things better than the current batch of wankers? Curious about how the hash functions behind the scenes? Want to know a bit more about what you can do? Check out the list of Mismanagement positions here. Please email the GMs if you are interested in a 2023 mismanagement position: EWH3GMs@gmail.com
New hab pre-order item available!
Want to rep Hashington DC anywhere you go? Hoodies and crewneck sweatshirts (in a variety of colors) are available for pre-order until November 29.
A limited number will be ordered in addition, so this is the only way to guarantee the perfect color and size combo! Order yours now!
Save the date for WIE! Weekend of March 31, 2023.
Give Back to the Hash!
BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
HARES! Ready to help hare or make your own trail? Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com.