Can you believe it’s been a DECADE of running around in non-clothing? No… no, you probably can’t. Memories don’t form correctly when under the influence of Twinkle Juice. There’s an anthem for that:
♫Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock♫
♫What the hell was in that shot?♫
♫Chocolate Milk and Everclear♫
♫Should have stuck to drinking beer♫
♫Now I have to Twinkle Puke♫
♫Fuck your fucking Twinkle Juice♫
Join us for the happiest, drunkiest tradition now in its TENTH year, the Anything But Clothes Hash! You know the drill by now – show up wearing anything EXCEPT clothing – trash bags, cardboard boxes, strategically placed stuffed animals, or just lots of duct tape. Duct tape is your friend. In a pinch? Wear a toga or a pillowcase. Just don’t be the only one who shows up in clothes! As always, there will be a prize for best costume promised, and usually delivered if the Twinkle Juice hasn’t taken over by then.
Oh. And there will be Twinkle Juice, as a part of four shot checks. Just take off Friday now.
See you there in a hastily thrown together duct tape mess, or a condom dress you’ve been working on for two months. We don’t care as long as it’s not clothes!
-Twinkle and Friends
When: 6:45 PM Thursday September 12th, 2019. Pack away at 7:15!
Where: Capitol South – follow marks to start!
Hares: Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock, Hungry Hungry Homo, All Flash No Drive, Split Her Bare, Sphincter Shy and Wank Like An Egyptian
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A. 0% Shiggy, dog friendly as long as it’s not wearing clothes. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly BRING A HEADLAMP & mug! Be smart, have fun. Consider taking Friday off.
How Far: Runners’ trail will be approximately 4 miles long (about 3 miles first half and 1 mile second half). Walkers’ trail is 2.5 miles long (1.25 first half and 1.25 second).
Last trains out of Capitol South Metro:
Blue Line Franconia-Springfield 11:19 PM
Silver Line Largo Town Center 11:30 PM
Blue Line Largo Town Center 11:45 PM
Orange Line New Carrollton 11:32 PM
Orange Line Vienna/Fairfax-GMU 11:25 PM
Silver Line Wiehle-Reston East 11:12 PM
Specials: Don’t worry about it. There will be ample Twinkle Juice outside.