EWH3 #622: Santa’s Elf Chase – Thursday, December 16, 2010  

Where: Pentagon City Metro – Yellow/ Blue Lines (not very festive, I know) – Follow marks to the skating rink!  If you’re there a bit early you can show off your Sonja Henie, Brian Boitano, Tonya Harding (ouch!) or Michelle Kwan moves for a mere $11.
When: 6:45 P.M, Thursday, December 16, 2010. Pack away at 7:00ish.  

Fairy Hares: Turbo Twat, Poop Bena Dick, PutItOut, Just Kathleen and Just Aaron

Misc: A to Z. Dog friendly except the fact this is an A to Z trail. Bring a flashlight and dry bag (it’s dark AND cold out there).  Might we suggest mittens as well?

OnOnOn:
Freddies Beach Bar
555 23rd Street South Arlington, VA 22202-2517.
They are putting up FABULOUS Christmas decorations just for us.
Everyone who walks in the door will immediately feel special.

TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!

6th Anal F*cking Klassy AGM & Holiday Party

Where: Trusty’s (1420 Pennsylvania Ave SE Washington DC)

When: Friday, December 10th, 7pm – 10pm

Cost: $30 pre-registration (by December 6th 9th) or $35 at the door (Note: The prereg has been extended!!)

Why: To celebrate last years MisManagment, whine about the new MisManagement and try to get laid.

For one low, low price you will get: 3 hours of Klassy boozin’ (Miller Light and Yuengling), real food, and hashers in their f*cking Klassy holiday attire. (Notice the capitol “K”!)

Click here do download the rego! Print it, fill it out and send it (with a $30 check) to Rear Protein Injection (the address is on the Rego) or just hand it to him at the next EWH3 hash.

A New Way to Pay: For those too drunk, too lazy, or too developmentally disabled to print and sign a registration form you can send in your registration fee via PayPal (if you have an account). PayPal $30 to [email protected], be sure to include your registration details (I.e. nerd name, hash name, home hash, and how many shots it takes to see you naked). RPI promises to only spend the PayPal money on beer and whores!

Sexy ElfIf you don’t know the Annual General Meeting (AGM) is where we announce the incumming MisManagement (i.e. the wankers who will be ruining the hash next year) and drink our faces off to celebrate the transfer of “power”.  Cum dressed in your Klassiest holiday clothes (think sleeveless x-mas sweaters, silly hats, dirty costumes or just go the classic route and slut it up), enjoy the open bar, and try to convince some wanker or wankette to let you unwrap their holiday gifts!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Who’s Cumming?

# Hash Name Home Hash
1 Rear Protein Injection EWH3
2 1 If by man, 2 if by she EWH3
3 Cum Squat EWH3
4 Cum Dumpling EWH3
5 Manniple Likter EWH3
6 ONe tit ONly WH4
7 Snatch Shot EWH3
8 Big Bang EWH3
9 And I’ll Push Backa EWH3
10 Have Fun Storming the Asshole EWH3
11 Cock-a-Doodle-Do Me EWH3
12 Just Matt Janiga Homeless
13 Just Matt Bronson EWH3
14 Just Timothy Newkirk EWH3
15 6 Fags EWH3
16 S & MOM EWH3
17 Please Step Away from the Whores WH4
18 Miss MeGagMe EWH3
19 CoXXX on Demand EWH3
20 Pittsburg Kneeler EWH3
21 Yule Log EWH3
23 A Red River Runs Through It EWH3
24 Motor Mouth DC Road Whores
25 Whiskey Business EWH3
26 Leggs Over Easy EWH3
27 My Little Pony EWH3
28 RU-469? EWH3
29 Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock EWH3
30 Double Ohh Positive EWH3
31 6 Pigs in a Blanket EWH3
32 Mellow Foreskin Cheese EWH3
33 Roll Over, Bitch! EWH3
34 Keyless Entry EWH3
35 Wanks Like an Egyption EWH3
36 General’s Farm Animal EWH3
37 Put It Out EWH3
38 Saskatchewsnatch SHIT
39 Just Jared Hautamaki SHIT
40 For Sale Or Rent WH4 $ MVH3
41 Silver Spooge EWH3
42 Raider of the Lost Box WH4
43 3-2-1 Fuck Off EWH3
44 Bad Ass Tongue Tricks  
45 An Inconvenient Poop EWH3
46 Dial F for F*ggot EWH3
47 John 3:69 EWH3

EWH3 #621: Woodley Park/Adams Morgan Trail – Thursday, December 9, 2010 
 
Where: Woodley Park/Adams Morgan Metro — Red Line. Follow marks to the start and look for cold wankers.
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, December 9, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares: Yule Log, Rear Protein Injection, Miss Me Gag Me, 1 if by man, 2 if by she.
 
Misc: A to A’. Runners’ trail is NOT dog friendly (sorry, no Fido on this trail). Bring a headlamp and dry shoes. And don’t forget your parka, mittens, ski mask, (f)Uggs, and whatever else yall put in those gigantic winter hash bags of yours. 
 
OnOnOn:
The Blagaurd
2003 18th St. NW
(Between California & U St.)
Washington, DC 20009
(202) 232-9005
  
Specials: $2.50 PBR tall boys, $10 Domestic pitchers, and $10 Sambuca shots!

————————————
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.
2) Sign up for EWH3’s 2010 AGM and Holiday party: http://www.ewh3.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=216&Itemid=78
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EWH3 #619: (Wild) Turkey Day Trail – Thursday, November 25, 2010 

Where: Rosslyn Metro — Blue/ Orange Line. The Continental Parking structure at 1911 Fort Myer Dr, Arlington, VA 22209. There may or may not be marks to follow due to the early time of day and/ or sobriety of the hares.

When: 11:00 AM, Thursday, November 25, 2010. Pack “away” at 11:05ish. 

Hares: PSA, Purple People Eater, Areola Borealis, Saskatchewsnatch, or any other of our Naughty Neighbors to the North who celebrated their crazy Thanksgiving last month.

Misc: A (Yep, just A. If you chose to wander around that is up to you). Dog friendly as long as the dog doesn’t bite PPE again. This hash is at 11AM so bring a headlamp only if you get scared on the metro. Maybe bring warm, dry clothes in case of rain. 

OnOnOn:
None. Its Thanksgiving so most everything is closed.
See below for potential openings later in the day.

————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:

1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/ Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.

2) Sign up for EWH3’s 2010 AGM and Holiday party: http://www.ewh3.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=216&Itemid=78

3) Bars open on Thanksgiving…

Tunnicliff’s Tavern (222 7th St SE)
12:30 PM – 1:00 AM
Bar and Turkey Dinner Only

The Ugly Mug (728 8th St SE)
5:30 PM – 1:00 AM
Bar Only – No Food

The Duplex Diner (18th & U NW)
8:30 PM – Close
Bar Only – No Food
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EWH3 #618: Beer Fairy Memorial Trail – Thursday, November 18, 2010 

Where: East Falls Church Metro — Orange Line. Metro out farther than you ever want to go on the orange line, avoid orange girls, follow marks to start and look for a bunch of fairies standing around (good thing we’re not starting in Dupont…)

When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, November 18, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 

Fairy Hares: Dildo Fairy, Butt Fairy and Fairy Phkr…also known as Dildo Shaggins, Everything Butt and Chkn Phkr

Misc: A to A’. Dog friendly. Bring headlamp and dry shoes, runners especially will want dry shoes. Also, please note that the metro is a mile away from the OnOnOn, so be prepared to leave in time to catch last train…or wander around suburbia looking for a cab. Also, for those of you who don’t know about Beer Fairy, this trail is a tribute to him. If you feel so inclined to dawn some wings/wigs/embrace your inner fairy, do it! Or just play around in one of the many playgrounds we’ll be running thru…because I know I will.

OnOnOn:
Ireland’s Four Provinces
105 W Broad St
Falls Church, VA 22046-4236
(703) 534-8999

Specials: TBD

————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:

1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/ Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.

2) EWH3 6th Anal F*cking Klassy AGM & Holiday Party – Friday, December 10th @ 7PM Details and registration here.

EWH3 #617: USMC Birthday Trail – Thursday, November 11, 2010 
 
Where: Rosslyn Metro — Blue/Orange Lines. Dodge tourists and follow marks to the Iwo Jima Memorial.
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, November 11, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares: My Little Pony, Rambutt, Bugs, Ass Ogre
 
Misc: A to Z. Or as your hares put it: A to Shot to Beer to Shots & Beer.  Happy 235th Birthday Marines!  Dog-friendly.  I think I saw some shiggy along the way.  I definitely saw a lot of liquid.  Headlamps are always a good idea.  Runners will be rewarded more than walkers. 
 
A note from your alpha hare:
Happy 235th Birthday Marines!
 
“On November 10, 1775, a Corps of Marines was created by a resolution of the Continental Congress. Since that date many thousands of men have borne that name Marine. In memory of them it is fitting that we who are Marines should commemorate the Birthday of our Corps by calling to mind the glories of its long and illustrious history.”
 
In every clime and place the Marines continuously stand ready.  In this place and clime, the Marine hares of EWH3 stand ready to deliver a trail symbolic of the rich Marine history.  Run, Drink, and Enjoy!
 
OnOnOn:
Jenny’s Asian fusion

1000 Water Street Southwest
Washington D.C., DC 20024
(202) 554-2202 

www.jennysdc.com
 
 
————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.
 

EWH3 #616: Graffiti Trail – Thursday, November 4, 2010 
 
Where: Foggy Bottom Metro — Blue/Orange Lines. Dawn that sexy, cheap white t-shirt with sharpie in hand and follow marks to the start.   
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, November 4, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares: Whiskey Business, Monday Sticky Monday, Underground Railroad, Just Liz
 
Misc: A to A’. Dog-friendly-ish…we may or may not be running thru a few buildings, so if you bring Fido be prepared to create your own trail from time to time.
 
A note from your alpha hare: It’s that time of year when the hash gets whiter than it normally is!  Break out your white shirts (or Tyvek suits), Sharpie markers, and your inappropriate comments for this year’s graffiti hash!  Enjoy a scenic trail through FoBo and DC with plenty of stops for opportunities to write all over your fellow hashers.  I personally intend to take swigs of each 4loko flavor and then spit them onto people’s white canvases (guess which hare I am!).  Craaaaazy colors!  Bring your writing instruments of choice, because we certainly won’t be providing you wankers with them.
 
OnOnOn:
Chadwick’s
3205 K Street
Washington, DC 20007
(202) 333-2565
http://www.chadwicksrestaurants.com/location.php?location=2

Specials: $2.50 Coronas and Corona Lights (read: Mexican piss and Mexican piss light)
 
 
————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.

EWH3 #616: Graffiti Trail – Thursday, November 4, 2010 
 
Where: Foggy Bottom Metro — Blue/Orange Lines. Dawn that sexy, cheap white t-shirt with sharpie in hand and follow marks to the start.   
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, November 4, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares: Whiskey Business, Monday Sticky Monday, Underground Railroad, Just Liz
 
Misc: A to A’. Dog-friendly-ish…we may or may not be running thru a few buildings, so if you bring Fido be prepared to create your own trail from time to time.
 
A note from your alpha hare: It’s that time of year when the hash gets whiter than it normally is!  Break out your white shirts (or Tyvek suits), Sharpie markers, and your inappropriate comments for this year’s graffiti hash!  Enjoy a scenic trail through FoBo and DC with plenty of stops for opportunities to write all over your fellow hashers.  I personally intend to take swigs of each 4loko flavor and then spit them onto people’s white canvases (guess which hare I am!).  Craaaaazy colors!  Bring your writing instruments of choice, because we certainly won’t be providing you wankers with them.
 
OnOnOn:
Chadwick’s
3205 K Street
Washington, DC 20007
(202) 333-2565
http://www.chadwicksrestaurants.com/location.php?location=2

Specials: $2.50 Coronas and Corona Lights (read: Mexican piss and Mexican piss light)
 
 
————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.

EWH3 #615: Twinkle’s Halloween Hash Bash: Anything But Clothes – Thursday, October 28, 2010 
 
Where: Chinatown Metro — Red/Yellow/Green Lines. H Street Exit. Follow marks to the start and try not to get arrested for indecent exposure.  
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, October 28, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares: Twinkle Twinkle Little Cock, Compost Pile, Pee on Your Colada, 6 Pigs in a Blanket, Just Paul, and Shamrock your Cock
 
Misc: A to B. Dog-friendly, but only if they’re not wearing clothes.
 
A note from your hares: That’s right – you read that title correctly. No clothes allowed this week. Anything but. Cover up your dangly parts with something else. Bust out those furs, sandwich boards, or strategically placed stuffed animals (puppies covering puppies?) and get as creative as you want. Or if you can’t find pool floaties, a flag, or caution tape, grab some garbage bags, towels, or plastic wrap – hell, reuse last week’s toga if you need to, just wash it first. Your bravery will be rewarded; the number of hares is directly correlated with the number of shots…We look forward to seeing you without your clothes on.

OnOnOn:
Kelly’s Irish Times
14 F St NW
Washington, DC 20001-1525
(202) 543-5433
www.kellysirishtimesdc.com
 
Specials: $3 bud drafts and $4 rail drinks.   
 
————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.
 
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EWH3 #614: FABuLOUS Toga Trail – Thursday, October 21, 2010

Where: Pentagon City Metro — Blue and Yellow Lines. Tie up your favorite toga, metro to Pentagon City and look for wankers standing around being stared at and/or follow marks to start. 
 
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, October 21, 2010. Pack away at 7:15ish. 
 
Hares:  Haystack, Just Chris G, and Just Peter M

Misc: A to B. Dog Friendly (yes, ladies and gents…there are NO TUNNELS on this trail, I’ve been promised). Along with your fanciest toga, make to wear a headlamp…it’s a fabUlous accessory. Oh and maybe bring some warm clothes for circle, or a flannel toga sheet. Either way.
  
OnOnOn:
Freddie’s Beach Bar and Karoake Palace of Wonder
555 23rd Street S
Arlington, VA
(703) 685-0555
www.freddiesbeachbar.com
 
Specials: It’s Freddie’s in togas, that’s pretty special enough.
 
————————————-
DC Area Upcumming Hash Events:
 
1) CHECK OUT BeltwayBob Hash Happy Hour http://www.dchashing.com/community/beltwaybob/  Tell them EWH3 sent you and then drink everyone else under the table.