Where: Foggy Bottom Metro (Blue / Orange /
Silver Line)
Hares: Deathly Swallows, Fist Pump, Colliteral
Damage, Head Injury, Cheech & Dong, General Tso’s Dicken, and You Sucked My Battledick
Virgins: Just Marissa
Visitor: none!
On-After: Recessions, you know why
Violations
Firstly, a commendation to our Brew Crew, Throbbin Hood and Cum Peg Me, for recruiting underage Mormon missionaries to the hash
before trail even got started by wearing nice little polka dot dresses and
showing off their foggy bottoms in the middle of a college campus.
Shot check hares You Sucked My Battledick and General
Tso’s Dicken celebrated their trail marriage with the breaking of a glass…bottle
of Evan Williams. Battledick rushed off
to the liquor store nearby and saved the day before the runners came. I sure wish that *my* significant other knew he
should go to the liquor store before I come!
Birthday bitch Deathly Swallows and fellow hare Colliteral Damage were clocked in their delightful polka dot aprons. You know what they say, dots in the front,
slots in the back. That definitely made
my dough rise.
I think the
hares got a little confused and thought that this trail was actually the
Boozy Horror Brunch Trail we had back in October… we got lost in the dark,
there was broken glass everywhere, and we encountered a playground with no kids
on it… just Sphincter Shy, shirtless.
Tuck Tuck
Deuce was overheard complaining about trail, per usual, presumably because
someone other than him was getting attention for getting older.
SchroCo
wanted people to closely observe his infectious looking spread of chest polka
dots – watch out unless you want to catch the pox! The anti-vaxxers might be concerned, but frankly,
I’d be lucky if measles was the worst thing I caught from fucking him.
No naming, just a very happy birthday to Deathly Swallows!
https://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.png00Scribehttps://www.ewh3.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/EWH3_logo-No-Background.pngScribe2019-04-15 22:34:382019-04-15 22:34:41EWH3 TRASH #1116: The Super PC Trail! - Thursday, March 28th - U St (Green/Yellow Line)
Hares: Mr Holland’s Anus, Wait Wait Don’t Fuck Me, Rail Mary, Maybe It’s Gaybelline, and a Mystery Hare
Virgins: None, go invite your friends!
Visitors: Just Linda Homeless, Fuck a bye baby from Ithica, Just Limel Homeless, and Cums on Vacation from Senegal
On-After: The Brig
It was a night of high fives, hairy palm Sunday jokes and extra long circles which are clearly Poon Apple Juice‘s favorite things. The beer was great as we still work through our WIE leftovers and the Naturdays still go down so sweet!
Violations!
Yachty McYachtface had a foamy beer at beer check and immediately began sucking…. but not because I told her to. Honey, we don’t care why, we are just glad that’s your reaction.
A commendation for Just Limel for singing us all the best visitor song we’ve had in a while.
Heaven’s Gape bragged a bunch for being first to beer check even though he clearly wasn’t… If you ain’t first, you’re last!
Lil Yachty returned to us for wearing a DCfray shirt… you need more friends than us?
Basement Boy Toy no longer has brand new shoes thanks to the contributions from our circle
Maybe It’s Gaybelline has no BDE or confidence in himself because he only buys condoms in a 3-pack… economics be damned!
Speaking of condoms, Quid Pro Blow has been using USAID condoms from his Uganda trip that are apparently 3mm larger than Magnums. No need to brag man!
For real the circle went fooooooorever, but everyone was having a blast!
And finally we should all be commended for getting to the Brig while they still had tables reserved (ooohhh bougie) and the Caps game on!
EWH3 Hash Trash #1122: The Deathly Birthday Polka Dot Trail
When: Thursday, April 18, 2019
Where: Foggy Bottom Metro (Blue / Orange / Silver Line)
Hares: Deathly Swallows, Fist Pump, Colliteral Damage, Head Injury, Cheech & Dong, General Tso’s Dicken, and You Sucked My Battledick
Virgins: Just Marissa
Visitor: none!
On-After: Recessions, you know why
Violations
No naming, just a very happy birthday to Deathly Swallows!
On – Naturdays are the new Everyday – on,
Stain Gretzky
EWH3 TRASH #1116: The Super PC Trail! – Thursday, March 28th – U St (Green/Yellow Line)
When: 3/28
Where: U St, Green/Yellow Line
Hares: Dial F, Roll Over Bitch, Scooter Cunte, Wank Like an Egyptian and possibly a mystery hare
Virgins: Just Karen, Just Nube, Just Melanie, Just Bridget, and Just Austin
Visitors: Coco from Beijing
Violations!
PSA waited so long to give The Cumburglur his nacklace that he had to make it himself
Knocked Up, during Prelewb gave the bartender an option of $50, or a handful of coins, $50 was taken
The Hares, for using blue chalk at night, because even in a PC world, colors matter
Captain Crash and Atari 6900 for being Ragnar racist, we get it, you like being in creeper vans together
Just Melanie was begging for beer, beer was received!
Wank arrived on a scooter because we all know they want to ride Scooter Cunte
Speaking of…
Scooter cunte, Heaven’s Gape and Deetz for the shittiest sweeping I’ve seen since a swifter was invented
Just Nube for making trail harder by doing parkor on everything possible
Infidelatio told Cum Dumpling not to kick the dog, and that PETA lover of course kicked the dog (by accident, please don’t sue us PETA)
Everyone who thought they solved a check on the first half…. the pack couldn’t tell… please use your outside voice
Cumlocker has been a no-see-em for so long she forgot that trail starts near metro stops, oh how the mighty have fallen
The Cumburglur and the circle called his mom and sang her Happy Birthday… not hashy birthday!
On – Happy Mama Cumby BDay – On
#Squadholes
EWH3 TRASH #1121: The Highfive Trail! – Thursday, April 11th – Eastern Market (Orange/Blue/Silver Line)
EWH3 #1121 The Highfive trail
When: 4/11
Where: Eastern Market, Orange/Blue/Silver
Hares: Mr Holland’s Anus, Wait Wait Don’t Fuck Me, Rail Mary, Maybe It’s Gaybelline, and a Mystery Hare
Virgins: None, go invite your friends!
Visitors: Just Linda Homeless, Fuck a bye baby from Ithica, Just Limel Homeless, and Cums on Vacation from Senegal
On-After: The Brig
It was a night of high fives, hairy palm Sunday jokes and extra long circles which are clearly Poon Apple Juice‘s favorite things. The beer was great as we still work through our WIE leftovers and the Naturdays still go down so sweet!
Violations!
Yachty McYachtface had a foamy beer at beer check and immediately began sucking…. but not because I told her to. Honey, we don’t care why, we are just glad that’s your reaction.
A commendation for Just Limel for singing us all the best visitor song we’ve had in a while.
Heaven’s Gape bragged a bunch for being first to beer check even though he clearly wasn’t… If you ain’t first, you’re last!
Lil Yachty returned to us for wearing a DCfray shirt… you need more friends than us?
Basement Boy Toy no longer has brand new shoes thanks to the contributions from our circle
Maybe It’s Gaybelline has no BDE or confidence in himself because he only buys condoms in a 3-pack… economics be damned!
Speaking of condoms, Quid Pro Blow has been using USAID condoms from his Uganda trip that are apparently 3mm larger than Magnums. No need to brag man!
For real the circle went fooooooorever, but everyone was having a blast!
And finally we should all be commended for getting to the Brig while they still had tables reserved (ooohhh bougie) and the Caps game on!
On- gimmie 5 – ON
#Squadholes