Suspension of EWH3 Trails
Due to the COVID-19 pandemic and elevated risk of transmission EWH3 has suspended weekly trails until further notice. Our priority is the safety of our members, and EWH3 Mismanagement will reassess whether the conditions permit us to responsibly and safely run a trail upon the lifting of the Mayor’s order. Please check this page for further updates as the situation warrants.
EWH3 #1172: The Flannel Fantasy trail- 6:45 PM Thursday, March 12th – Rhode Island Avenue (Red Line)
Everybody loves flannel. It’s cozy, it’s fashionable, and it’s never out of season. Whether your flannel style is this…
this…
or this…
… there is a flannel look for everyone. Bust out your pjs, button ups, kilts, and show us your buffalo.
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, March 12th. Pack away at 7:15!
Where: Rhode Island Avenue metro – exit to the left (do not cross the bridge)- follow marks to start!
Hares: Stain Gretzky, Atari 6900, Dial F, Chicks Ahoy!, Cheech & Dong, and L’Chymen
Trail Length: Runners total trail: 1st half 2.4mi / 2nd half 2.0mi
Walker’s total trail: 1st half 1.1mi / 2nd half 0.9mi
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B. No chance of PI, should be dog friendly and they are allowed on the patio at on-after. Pack smartly and definitely bring a cranium lamp. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a mug! Be smart, have fun.
Last trains out of NoMa Gallaudet: RED: Glenmont 11:34pm / Shady Grove 11:26 pm
On-After: Red Bear Brewing Co. (209 M St NE)
Specials: Red Bear is staying open an extra hour just for us and we’ll have reserved tables. Tip your bartenders!
Hash Trash #1170: The Thanks, RuPaul! Trail
When: February 27, 2020
Where: Francis Scott Key Park, Georgetown (Rosslyn Metro)
Hares: Throbbin’ Hood, Mourning Wood, Jigglytits, Poon Tang Clan
Virgins: Several, all decisively half-minded
So there we were, holy hellfire shit, all set to celebrate RuPaul’s return on NOT a hashing night and the no-doubt-imminent return of the Drag Race stans to our hashy fold… but DC’s winter decided to give us our toughest challenge yet (at least in 2020), and as a result we learned who the most dedicated queens were as we met/huddled/penguined at Francis Scott Key Memorial Park near Georgetown.
Deep Anal Horizon joined hares Mourning Wood and Throbbin’ Hood in bravely donning his finest, flowiest attire for the trail, while the rest of pack’s no-doubt-excellent drag attempts were buried under layers of warm clothing… right guys?
After a short and rousing starting circle in which the hare representative told us several lies and at least one truth and Joe’s tongue got stuck to a metal pole, pack dodged e x p e n s i v e traffic and headed north. On the zig-zaggy way to beer check, pack encountered Cum Dumpling‘s Sink Hole, performed a scenic tour of Georgetown’s finest dead-end alleys, were foiled by a Back Check in the middle of a wildly bougie housing area, and were elaborately and roundaboutly foiled by a check that was hiding inside a s p o o k y park. (Nobody wants to break a heel, I get it.)
Beer check was longer than pack liked and much shorter than sweep hare would have liked, but after pouring several down our throats in honor of DC’s Female Union Band Society, pack quickly bounded away and headed back down the hill. After a much more straightforward, less check-y, and less getting lost-y second trail half, we circled up under Francis Scott Key’s memorial bridge (so fancy) and had a chilly, melodic conversation about what we thought of the hares.
Highlights from circle included:
Thus feted, we quickly scooted our cold yet elegant butts over to Church, where we all took off our stilettos to battle our way to the bar through a veritable sea of suits, the likes of which the world has not seen (since the last RNC convention probably).
On-dibs on next drag trail during higher temps-on,
Jigglytits~
EWH3 #1171: The 4th Anal Glory Days trail- 6:45 PM Thursday, March 5th – Union Station (Red Line)
It’s time to flashback to those days of yore. Bust out those letter jackets, JNCOs, wrestling uniforms, or other memorabilia. You know you want to wear it outside the house.
When: 6:45 PM, Thursday, March 5th. Pack away at 7:15!
Where: Union Station – follow marks to start!
Hares: GeriatricMandering, Coliteral Damage, Tacos on a Bridge, Moose Knuckles, Honey Bunches of Cunt, & Atari 6900!
Trail Length: Runners total trail: 1st half 2.1mi / 2nd half 2.1mi
Walker’s total trail: 1st half 1.0mi / 2nd half 1.0mi
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to Z and a pavement pounder. If you find bushes and other PI you’ve gone too far back in time. Stroller & dog friendly. Pack smartly and bring a cranium lamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.
Last trains out of Eastern Market:
ORANGE: New Carrollton 11:34pm / Vienna Fairfax-GMU 11:23 pm
BLUE: Largo 11:47pm / Franconia Springfield 11:17pm
SILVER: Largo 11:32pm / Wiehle-Reston 11:10pm
On-After: Finn McCool’s, 713 8th St SE
Specials: Stay tuned! There’s something called ‘Kicked the Keg’ as well.