Wankers!

Our Anal General Meeting is just one week away and your committee has some exciting updates for you.

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Due to a New World Order, there has been a venue change. We will now gather at Astro Beer Hall in Metro Center. Your rego still includes two+ hours of open bar and snacks. This new venue will allow for bottomless gluten-free options for all!

Now is the time to place your nominations for EWH3 Superlatives. Use the Google Form here to submit your nominations by Thursday at 11:59 PM. The final winners will be chosen through a vote by AGM attendees. You will receive a voting link at sign-in.

Schedule:

8:30 PM – Doors Open

9:00 PM – Open Bar Begins

9:15 PM – Voting for Superlative Closes

9:30 PM – Circle

11:00 PM – Last Call for Open Bar

11:30 PM – Final Bell

Bring your A-game, a credit card for additional food or shots, and cash to tip the bartenders. You will need an ID. No nudity will be permitted at this event.

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Online regos close on Thursday, January 12 at 11:59 PM. After this, day-of regos will be available at the door for $42. Don’t delay, Rego now!

On – OH MY GOD IS THAT TURD KIND WITH A STEEL CHAIR?! – On
AGM Committee 


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The holidays are over and you’re still full from eating nothing but cheese for a week, but your hares are here to ease you into 2023 whether with a short run or bundle down in blankets. Make sure to bring your onesies, snuggies, and blankets.

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO (link).

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, January 5, 2023. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!

Where: Union Station – Meet in front by the bell

Nearest Capital Bike Share: Columbus Circle across from the Thurgood Marshall Building

Hares: GeriatricMandering, Colliteral Damage, Bless Me Father for I Have Rimmed, & Split Her Bare

Trail Details:
– Runners: 1.5 mi. first half / 2 mi. second half

– Walkers: .7 first half / .9 mi. second half

– Shiggy: 0.69


Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A (1 block to metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun.

End Metro: Union Station

Last Trains Out:

– Glenmont (Red): 12:12 am

– Shady Grove (Red): 11:58 pm

On After*: Union Pub. If you plan to come to the On After, note that indoor venues may choose to keep vaccine and mask requirements in place. There are indoor and outdoor options.

Specials: Pitcher specials

*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.

Upcoming Events & Announcements!

  • EWH3 2023 AGM is January 14, 2023 – rego here!
  • Save the date for WIE! Weekend of March 31, 2023.

Give Back to the Hash!  

  • BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
  • ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com

Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!

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It’s been a long year, so let’s gather for a short trail. 

Note: Due to the holiday, this is NOT a standard trail. Similar to Thanksgiving, you’ll be lucky to burn off a glass of champagne. You MUST bring your ID. Cash is highly recommended if you’d like a different drink at beer check or to tip your bartenders. There will be NO bag van OR runners option (you can always run to start).

Bring your A-game as we celebrate the resolutions that have cum and gone. Didn’t meet yours? No worries, we’ll have plenty of opportunities to cash in before the new year. 

A guide to achieving some of the Top 50 New Year’s Resolutions:

– PR the hash – This walkers-route only trail is less than a mile long. A brisk power walk will help you meet this super attainable goal.

– Be more generous – Don’t be a Scrooge! Buy a shot for one of the hares at our bar-based beer checks. 

– Support more local businesses –  Over-tip your bar staff (the ones who really keep this city moving)!

– Volunteer more/Give back to the community – Everyday is Wednesday needs more martyrs like yourself. Sign up to hare or brew crew while you rego. 

– Lose weight – Oh, hush! You’re beautiful just the way you are!

– Quit smoking – We’ll be inside for most of this trail, so no smoking allowed!

– Save more money – As a gift for joining us, your hares are providing two beers and free popcorn! Take that extra moolah and rego for AGM!

– Be more outgoing – There will be plenty of opportunities for violations. Step out of your comfort zone and speak up!

– Unplug from social media – Hey, no tech on trail. 

– Stop Procrastinating – Rego right now!

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO (link).

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, December 29, 2022. Pack away at 7:00 PM!

Where: Gallery Place/Chinatown – Circle Up at Pre-Lube at Bulldog Pizza – 713 H St NW

Nearest Capital Bike Share: 8th & H NW

Hares: Poon-apple Juice, Burlington Ho Factory, Dry Rub

Trail Details: Walkers Option ONLY: The entire trail is 0.3 miles.

Shiggy Level: Zero. This is a glorified miniature pub crawl. 


Miscellaneous Crap: Miscellaneous Crap:  Trail is, for all intents and purposes A to A and is a non-traditional trail. Bring your ID, money for beer check(s), and (just the) tip! Sign up on Hash Rego is Required! Be smart, have fun.

Schedule of Events:

6:00 – Pre-Lube at Bulldog Pizza

6:45 – Circle Up at Bulldog Pizza

7:00 – On Out!

7:05 – Choose-your-own-adventure Beer Check (ID required) – One hash sponsored beer will be provided! Bring an ID for any other buy-your-own drinks. Happy hour until 8:00 means specials and free popcorn for all!

7:40 – On out to second choose-your-own-adventure Beer Check (ID required), with one hash sponsored beer provided! Second beer check has a happy hour that ends at 8:00 SHARP, so move fast to get those $4 drinks.

8:30 – On out to in-bar “end circle.” We will provide beer for down-downs, but you are responsible for the rest of your beverages this evening.

** You MUST rego 24 hours before the event to guarantee you are included in the glutard count. Please be considerate and only select this option if you have a true gluten allergy.

Last trains out of Union Station (Red Line):

– Branch Ave: 11:53 PM

– Glenmont: 12:08 AM

– Greenbelt: 12:16 AM

– Shady Grove: 12:02 AM

On-After: 618 Cocktail and Whiskey Lounge

Upcoming Events & Announcements!

  • EWH3 2023 AGM is January 14, 2023 – rego here!
  • Save the date for WIE! Weekend of March 31, 2023.

Give Back to the Hash!  

  • BREW CREW! Do you enjoy those beverages on trail? Brews require brew crews! Email ewh3brewmeister@gmail.com to keep the hash alive. See the EWH3 calendar for dates.
  • ADOPT A METRO! Love to explore? We need hashers to walk/jog/bike/drive to potential Beverage Checks and On-Ins and check them out. Email ewh3harerazor@gmail.com

Did you really cum all the way here for this? Sign up to receive trail announcements directly to your inbox by emailing ewh3harerazor@gmail.com!