When: 6:45 PM Thursday April 26th, 2018. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Van Ness Metro

Hares: Put It Out, Blows A Tranny, Can’t Find Pussy In A Haystack, Generals Farm Animal, & Please Step Away From The Whores

Virgins: Just Curin (?), Just Liza

Visitor: Skank the Tank

469 is a value of n for which n!-1 is prime.

Interstate 469 is an Interstate highway in the northeastern portion of the midwestern state of Indiana. In 2004, local officials namerd all 31 miles of I-469 in honor of the late former US President Ronald Reagan.

Area code 469 correlates to somewhere near Frisco, TX.

Year 469 was a common year starting on Wednesday. How fitting.

At the time, the year 469 was known as the Year of the Consulship of Marcianus and Zeno.

In the year 469:

The Ostrogoth prince Theordoric, age 15, returned to Pannonia after living as a child hostage in Constantinople.

The Vandals invaded Epirus, now known as Albania. They were expelled from the Peloponnese (Greece) and in retaliation, take 500 hostages at Zakynthos. On the way back to Carthage, they are slaughtered.

King Euric declared himself independent from the Western Roman Empire.

General’s Farm Animal was born.

Oh, wait…

Regardless of the number on his birth certificate (did they have birth certificates back then?), EWH3 has enjoyed his company at no less than four. hundred. sixty. nine. trails.

469 trails is a big achievement, and we celebrated with a keg (-ish) of some sort of rye beer.

GFA has been hashing longer than this scribe has been alive. His biggest fantasy is to live to see 569. #smallattainablegoals

GFA is the second bass in his choir, which is one base further than he’s gotten in quite some time. #thatswhyhewasscreaminghisownname

In true grumpy old man fashion, GFA was overheard this week screaming “hey deer! Get out of my woods!#oldmanyellsatclouds


Wait Wait Don’t Fuck Me admitted to attending FIVE proms. Don’t get excited about this Casanova, though. He took his sister to all of them.

Schrodinger’s Cock was complaining about the smell while sitting on a trashcan. Maybe he should eat more pineapple?

This was the oldest group of hares we’ve had.. Maybe ever. They showed their age by sundowning quite hard, laying the same trail twice in one hash. They even forgot we had already had a beer check. Meanwhile, on walker’s trail, our hare walked us past a fake dog, proving that just because something is sitting erect, that doesn’t mean you should pet it.

In honor of the man who doesn’t know when to quit, the pack stuck around to drink a whole bunch of celebratory beers and sing about an abundance of El Caminos.


We Guapo’d.

On – #Imtooyoungforthis – On

Poon-apple Juice

For general questions on hashing, email us questions at [email protected].

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Your hares invite you to run around and drink beer!

When: 6:45 PM Thursday April 26th, 2018. Pack away at 7:15!

Where: Van Ness Metro (Red Line) – follow marks to start!

Prelube: The hares will holding court at Acacia Food & Wine before trail. Its a block up the street at 4340 Connecticut Ave and it’s happy hour.

Hares: Put It Out, Blows A Tranny, Can’t Find Pussy In A Haystack, Generals Farm Animal, & Please Step Away From The Whores

Miscellaneous Stuff to Ponder: Trail is A to B. It should be a nice night. Pack smartly and bring a headlamp & mug! Be smart, have fun.

Last trains out of Tenleytown:
We’re going to Guapos. You know you will be calling an Uber after the Metro has long since shut down for the night.

On After:
4515 Wisconsin Ave. NW

You are special

As the owner of a lovable purr ball myself, I was honored to be of assistance to this paw-some trail organized by our hares: General Tso’s Dicken, L’Chymen, The Hyperpoop, GeriatricMandering, Poon-apple Juice, and Son What The Fuck?!

Before the Tour du Feline left start, we met our virgins — Justs Clark, Adrian, Andrew, and James — who followed the GMs directions like so:

And while no stray cats were picked up on trail, some hashers clawed it out to make the cut for the EWH3 Drama Club spring production of CATS!:
Amerigo Vespoogie as Mr. Mistoffelees
Greatest Ho on Earth as Grizabella
Shetland Blow Me as Rum Tum Tugger
Shitty Porn Story as Jennyanydots
Tragic Carpet Ride as Old Deuteronomy

GeriatricMandering was scolded for drinking from a can, but she was just following the example set by her cat who likes to lick tuna from a can.

The RA for the evening, Colliteral Damage, was blamed for bringing weather as cold as the hares favorite dessert: mice cream!

And one important question was posed to the hares: I can haz down down?

Thanks to the flowing beverages and patio space at Wundergarten, a rambunctious naming was held.

Just Jon was introduced to the hash by his roommate, General Tso’s Dicken. By day he is mild-mannered researcher, but by night he spends hours modding video games to his personal preferences. The genre isn’t called fantasy for nothing! The number of fandoms discussed during his naming tallies that of recent movie filled with homages to pop culture, and so Just Jon will henceforth and forever more be called: Ready Player None.

Meow, mew, mmmrrooowwww….
— Mambo # Hives