When: Thursday, March 15, 2019

Where:  Francis Scott Key Park, Rosslyn Metro (Orange / Blue / Silver Line)

Hares:  PIO, Brokeback Mama, COXXX On Demand, Seizure’s Phallus, and Sally The Jizz Hound

Virgins:  none, they all froze

Visitors:  Three Amigos from OTH (which is Pudjam, u guys)

• Radioactive Cum Swallower
• Genghis Anus
• Abuela Mastabata

On-After:  Mr. Smith’s (ew)

It was cold as fuck that night and I think the hash’s humor well pretty much froze over, so not much to offer here…

Violations

• Just Dexter The Dog had to be carried up the second half of the Exorcist stairs.  What a bitch.
• The hares broke Lent tradition and instead of laying a fishy trail it was a full-on sausage fest.
• #SquadHoles thought that this trail through a college campus was really awesome but it left his knees really sad.  I hear ya buddy, my knees hadn’t felt that bad since the last time I was on a college campus.
• And I would be remiss if I did not draw attention to the fact that Throbbin’ Hood thought Abuela Mastabata was Maybe It’s Gaybelline.

Enough of that shit, we had a very solemn occasion on this frigid night…… A NAMING!!!!

Meet Just Alex, he works for the government and has three degrees, which explains why he is a triple bottom engineer.  He’s from West Philly and ended up on the stage because he sucks at sports.  He’s masturbated to completion while driving a car and shit himself at work after a long bike commute.  He got a boner in math class and the worst thing he’s ever put up his butt was a butt plug 3 sizes too big.  After it was clearly established that we were going with a butt name, suggestions like Eyes Bigger Than My Anus and Department of the Posterior were floated (and my personal favorite, Scrooge McButt), but given his love of engineering and straight up rearing, henceforth and forevermore throughout the world of hashing, Just Alex shall be known as Deep Anal Hoerizon.

On – boots n shats n boots n shats – on,

Stain Gretzky