EWH3# 753: The Luvvvvv Bunnies Trail Trash
6:45 PM Thursday February 14, 2013- Braddock Road Metro (Yellow/Blue line)
When: 6:45 PM Thursday February 14, 2013. Pack away at 7:15ish.
Where: Braddock Road Metro Station (yellow/blue line)
Hares: Excuse me, Is that your Bunny?; Mr. cArrot; You Sucked my Battle Bunny; S&MOBunny; Can’t find Bunny in a Haystack; Anal Bunny; Just Omar Bunny
Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B. Bring warm clothes, pack light, and bring a light.
On On On: O’Shaughnessy’s Pub (formerly Laughing Lizard Lounge)
1324 King Street
Alexandria, VA 22314
Oh Valentines Day, what other Hallmark designed holiday will reminded you are alone than any other. Well if you spent it alone that’s your fault you could have been hashing with us and made a strong attempt at least make out with a hasher at the bar after the hash, I know I did. Now for the details of the evening.
This wonderful Valentines day story begins in Virginia, Virginia is for lovers you know. Marks to start were easy to find and the pack gathered on the athletic field just around the corner from Braddock metro. Plan B showed up not long before circle began and parked just feet from where the pack had gathered. The GM for the evening Dont Ask Dont Smell began by introducing more lonely hearts to our club for the evening. These virgins Just Lenard and Just Leslie didn’t know what they were in for. We also had a visitor form some African hash, Ekeva Supa which translates to Fab-u-lass or something like that. Thanks for coming out!!!
Our Hare representatives Cant find Pussy in a Haystack and S.M.O.M explained our Valentines day Bunny trail and proceeded to demonstrate a dance of button pushing using your cotton tail and bunny ears. The pack was then off into the streets of Alexandria.
The hares made a smart decision to make a short run of it all. We made a quick stop for beverages at a pleasant and sketchy location beside the railroad tracks. We then found Plan B a second time in a dark alley just off of king street in Alexandria where the pack gathered, putting on warmer clothes, huddling for warmth and drinking more beverages. The RA for the evening Cock-a-Doodle-Do Me began circle and called out the hares while Just Omar served beverages to the violators in circle. Jubilee Bless Me Father For I Have Rimmed made handed out a few necklaces to hashers that had 17 runs.
Violations!!
–I eat street meats seems to have a bit in common with Lance Armstrong and as he publicly admitted that he had been blood doping and taking performance enhancers before the hash for years now.
–Traggic Carpet Ride was so blacked out by beer check he had to ask whether or not he was at end circle or not.
–Brown Eye for the Gay Guy Was caught at the start humping a child size tackling dummy, when told those are meant for children he responded “pee wee is just a number”
–Tend her Loins she may be a little late for storing things away for the winter, but was spotted at the check filling her pockets with cookies for later.
–Just Leslie was violated for possibly being a man, She was heard at the start saying to another harriet “can I put my package in your
-Whiskey Business was violated for turning down a cookie at check because “that has too many calories”
–Pinocchi Ho Received a cream frosting covered cupcake from the hares at a check on trail. He said he hadn’t had that much cream on his face since he me that priest at a truck stop bathroom a few months back.
After some Violations from the crowd we then began the solemn occasion of a NAMING!!!!
Just Omar was the lucky hasher to have his past history exploited for the entertainment of the pack. Just Omar is a GMU grad and just like every one else in the Beltway does something government related to support his hashing problem. He lost is virginity to his best friends twin sister while the three of them watched the Lion king. He has had a fetish for Disney movies since. The last time he soiled himself was after a sneeze during a tough bout with the Flu a few months prior. Other relevant info the pack drew out was that he is of Pakistani heritage and the first woman he was with was Asian There were a few honorable mentions for names such as Children of the Cornhole, Fudge Paki, La Whore, Kim Jong Poo, Sol Patch, and Field of creams. The only name found worthy of this hasher is Zero Shart Thirty for which he will now be know forever in the world of hashing, except (you know who you are) F*ck them!!!
And Everyone was happy, making there way to the bar to salvage some loving from fellow hashers !!!
ON- Hope you got Lucky -ON
Little Thunder Clap
EWH3 Scribe