EWH3# 777: The We <3 WH4 Trail Trash! Thursday June 27, 2013- Woodley Park-Zoo/Adams Morgan Metro (Red Line)
Where: Woodley Park-Zoo/Adams Morgan Metro (Red Line). Follow marks to the start.
When: 6:45 PM Thursday June 27, 2013. Pack away at 715ish.
Hares: Mursey F*ck, Haystack, Math Sucks, Snatch Shot and mystery hare
Weather: H92; L76; 40% chance of rain, scattered thunderstorms, wind SSW at 10mph.
On On On: Atomic Billiards
This trail started on a moist afternoon in June and soon turned into a soggy sh*t show. The skies were clear as the pack circled up at the corner of Connecticut and Calvert. Our brew crewers for the night Rape and Spillage and Yeast infection managed to find a spot for Plan-B brew just a stones throw from sign in. The GM for the evening Colliteral Damage started off by introducing the virgins to the pack, just Deborah, Laura, Lauren, Matt, Susan, Justine, and Spencer. We had a trio of visitors Brokeback Dyke, Blackie, and Goats are Baaad. The hare representatives Mursey F*ck, Snatch Shot, and Hungry Hungry Homo explained in advance how poorly the trail was laid and the pack may as well go home. But most of the pack stayed and after a song about a man with children likely to byproducts of a cheating wife the pack was off.
The hares ran the pack through various parts of the rock creek park and thoroughly scattered the pack around. This may have been due to Mursey F*ck writing trail marks in Spanish. The pack found Plan-B for a quick beer check, they were then turned around back the way they came and found Plan-B again at the end of washed out Klingle road.
The RA for the night Cock-a-Doodle-Do-Me circled up the pack and started circle as the skies began to open, violating the hares, reintroducing the virgins and reminding us that we have some weird visitors. Then it was time for violations!!
–Zero Shart Thirty was violated for making use of the first aid kit because as he stated “the burning wont stop” I suggest you see a gynecologist about that.
–Pole Her Express was violated for needing the assistance of a Mexican (Mursey F*ck) to get past a fence.
–Kindergarten Cock was violated for the fact that after being gone to a foreign country for several months the best story he had to tell was when he saw two dogs having sex outside a barber shop.
Then it was time for the most solemn occasion of a naming. The lucky hasher to put their knees in a puddle this week was just Catherine. A little about Catherine, she attended a lesbian training school of Wellesley where she studied political science and now in school for a PHD in the same BS major, has a hot mom who was a ballet dancer, once had a summer job as a camp counselor where she kissed a guy named Dave, her siblings used to threaten to throw her cat(WTF?), and has a serious ability for avoiding the question when she doesn’t want to answer it. The pack had a good barrage of names come through right from the start, Beats around the Bush, Dicklomatic Relations, Dicks Over Man Anytime(DOMA), 3 Hour Whore, Twat Hunter, Cunt Get No Satisfaction and many others that the rain washed away in my notebook. But only one name was worthy of this hasher. Forever more and throughout the world of hashing except (you know who you are) Just Catherine will be known as The Lez Boat!!
And then the pack was Happy, Macho mugs were nowhere in sight had and the pack made their way through the monsoon to atomic billiards.
On – My hash bag washed away -On
EWH3 Scribe
Little Thunder Clap