Another year older, none the wise. Cum join Schrödinger’s Cock as he attempts to thwart the gods of aging by dressing as another hasher’s name. Dress like a hare for a super special shot check opportunity! Like Nicholas Cage (or John Travolta? Still not sure..), it’s time for a face… off!

Need some inspiration? Check out some of last year’s guests of honor, including…

When: 6:48 PM Thursday 08/08/8819. Pack away at 7:18!

Where: Dupont Circle – Follow marks to the circle!

Hares: Schrödinger’s Cock, Poon-apple Juice, Son What the Fuck, Stain Gretzky, and Whoregon Trail!

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to B-ish. It should be a nice night for a face/off. Pack smartly, bring your mug, and Be smart, have fun, hunt down your doppelgänger.

How far: Runners’ trail will be approximately 4.1 miles (about 2.6 first half, 1.5 second half). Walkers’ trail is about half the distance of runners’.

Shiggy Level: 0.88

Last trains out of Farragut North (Red Line):
Glenmont 11:31 PM
Shady Grove 11:39 PM

Last trains out of Farragut West (Orange/Blue/Silver Line):
Franconia-Springfield 11:32 PM
Largo Town Center 11:30 PM
New Carrollton 11:19 PM
Vienna/Fairfax/GMU 11:40 PM
Wiehle-Reston East 11:25 PM

On After: Recessions Don’t lie. You know exactly where it is.

Specials: $1 off domestic drafts and Karaoke! Pretend to be someone who knows how to sing while dressed as the hash name of another person. This won’t get confusing at all.

Friday, August 2 is International Beer Day! Celebrate the eve of this sacred holiday by stumbling through the woods with people you thank Gispert are not your blood relatives, then gather ’round a religious adviser to tell heartwarming stories mock your fellow wankers in scatological detail.

Twas the night before Beermas, when all through the hash
The creatures were r*nning, and we even had cash;Shiggy socks were donned on legs dark and pale, All for the sake of drinking cheap ale;Brew crew was nestled all snug in Scrotal,While visions of Naturdays danced in their noodle.

When: Thursday, August 1, 6:45 PM circle up, pack away 7:15!

Where: Cleveland Park Metro – follow marks to start

Who: Beer Me Closer Tiny Dancer; Barley 6900; Son, Where’s My Beer; Goldman Ballstouts; Rosetta Brew; They Brew Up So Fast

Length:Runners: 1st half – 2.6m  2nd half – 1.3mWalkers: 1st half   – 1.8m 2nd half – .8m

Misc. Crap: Trail is A to B. There’s some shiggy, y’all. Bring a HEADlamp, BUG SPRAY, & mug. Walkers dog friendly. Not stroller friendly. 

Last trains out of Van Ness:
Red to Shady Grove: 11:48pmRed to Glenmont: 11:22pm

On AfterGUAPOS

Specials:  You’re all special.